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Lock Me! Please.

#126 The Journalist

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Posted 24 October 2004 - 09:33 PM

however, a year for Bob was seventeen seconds, due to some odd complications involving a hammer, a time machine, and a desk lamp.

Hyperbole is the best thing ever!

#127 Avatara

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Posted 24 October 2004 - 10:00 PM

That doesn't begin to cover what happened with the toaster.

"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.

*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
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#128 The Journalist

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Posted 24 October 2004 - 10:49 PM

It made toast.

Hyperbole is the best thing ever!

#129 Pufer

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Posted 24 October 2004 - 11:41 PM

Yummy toast, at that.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#130 Rickton

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Posted 25 October 2004 - 03:40 PM

And so, Bob's food supply quickly ran out.

Currently making Possession 2, a game where you play as a ghost and possess your enemies.

#131 The Journalist

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Posted 27 October 2004 - 05:01 PM

Ran out the window, no less.

Hyperbole is the best thing ever!

#132 Pufer

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Posted 27 October 2004 - 11:42 PM

Stunned by his food's escape, Bob set off to soak his head in a bucket of lemon juice in order to realign himself with the flow of the universe. Unfortunately, all it did was sting his eyes in a rather severe manner.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#133 Azeroth

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Posted 28 October 2004 - 07:02 PM

Deciding that if his eyes weren't there they couldn't hurt him, he gouged them out with an electric guitar.

Tempting a sleeping giant with a pin isn't the same as hurling a whale at an irritated giant. -Avatara
"Hey, I'm not the one who wanted Gay Sex to become a moderator." -Avatara
"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>

#134 Pufer

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Posted 28 October 2004 - 11:31 PM

He immediately regretted this action as he recalled that he had tickets to a mime festival happening that evening. Bob liked his mimes.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#135 Avatara

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Posted 28 October 2004 - 11:54 PM

Fortunately, Bob remembered he had old potatoes in the basement. He somehow managed to substitute the potatoes' eyes for his old eyes.

#136 Pufer

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Posted 29 October 2004 - 09:30 AM

He went to the mime festival as planned but, soon after walking in, was grabbed up and tossed into the back of a black panel-van by the optometrists. They couldn't allow the general populace to find out the universal nature of potato eyes.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#137 Rickton

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Posted 29 October 2004 - 05:06 PM

So they gave Bob new OMgCYB0RGeY3Z++!!!!1!!!2!1!11!!@!!11!

Currently making Possession 2, a game where you play as a ghost and possess your enemies.

#138 Pufer

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Posted 29 October 2004 - 11:39 PM

But they fell off after only a week.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#139 Rickton

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Posted 30 October 2004 - 06:07 PM

Proving prosthetics have a long way to go.

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#140 Avatara

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Posted 30 October 2004 - 09:05 PM

Meaning Bob was in for more trouble, as he suddenly found himself a Eunuch.

#141 Rickton

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Posted 02 November 2004 - 07:48 PM

Although this meant he got to hang out with lots of hot women without anyone getting jealous.

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#142 Rickton

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Posted 12 November 2004 - 05:26 PM

But Bob was saddened because he was being ignored.

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#143 Avatara

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Posted 12 November 2004 - 05:49 PM

So Tom walked up to Bob and suckerpunched him in the face.

#144 Pufer

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Posted 12 November 2004 - 06:00 PM

After regaining his composure, Bob stood up and stuck a cob of corn up Tom's nose then laughed heartily.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#145 Rickton

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Posted 14 November 2004 - 06:41 PM

Tom was not pleased.

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#146 Avatara

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Posted 14 November 2004 - 06:51 PM

So Tom stole Bob's purse and pants and sold them to the Hong Kong Triad.

#147 Sundered Angel

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Posted 15 November 2004 - 12:24 AM

Who onsold it to a foolish American tourist at a 10000% markup.

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#148 Pufer

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Posted 15 November 2004 - 12:42 AM

As could be expected, the foolish American tourist turned out to be none other than our hero Bob.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#149 Azeroth

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Posted 15 November 2004 - 09:12 AM

But, Bob didn't have enough money to buy it! So he converted his turtles into dollar bills.

#150 Pufer

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Posted 15 November 2004 - 11:22 AM

The turtles didn't care much for this so they went on a mad killing spree. Of course, it wasn't particularly effective seeing as they were turtles and all.

-Pufer

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha