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This topic is lockedThis post has been edited by Trah: 06 February 2005 - 11:24 AM
Lock Me! Please.
#1
- King of the East
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 01:27 PM
It started as a normal day. Bob had a good day at the set-them-ablazing factory, but on his way home, his brand new riding hippo was abducted by living cheese. Bob walked home, and started his quest to save his hippo from the cheese. He took with him on his mission...
MultiQuote
#2
- Has a penis ship.
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 01:30 PM
half a swede, and nothing else.
This post has been edited by pp0u20e8: 19 September 2004 - 01:31 PM
"In closing, pp0u20e8 for moderator!" - grunk ~~~~~~ "pp0u20e8 is awesome." - Qaanol (Oh yes you did!)
<Pikeman> Just Chat is like Bacardi 151... it can be really stimulating, but only in very small doses, because overall it just tastes like s### and can get you in a lot of trouble.
<Pikeman> Just Chat is like Bacardi 151... it can be really stimulating, but only in very small doses, because overall it just tastes like s### and can get you in a lot of trouble.
#4
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 03:01 PM
Fortunately, his half a swede wasn't enough to cover him, so a policeman soon pulled him over and gave him a free ride to the nearest station, where he was charged with the crime of public indecency.
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#5
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 03:57 PM
Bob had, after all, been raised by wolves and had no concept of clothing. The police chief gave him a crash course in pants, shorts, t-shirts, as well as using silverware.
Tempting a sleeping giant with a pin isn't the same as hurling a whale at an irritated giant. -Avatara
"Hey, I'm not the one who wanted Gay Sex to become a moderator." -Avatara
"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>
"Hey, I'm not the one who wanted Gay Sex to become a moderator." -Avatara
"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>
#7
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 05:14 PM
Azeroth, on Sep 19 2004, 03:57 PM, said:
Bob had, after all, been raised by wolves and had no concept of clothing. The police chief gave him a crash course in pants, shorts, t-shirts, as well as using silverware.
With Bob's knowledge of the new fangled ideas such as clothes and silverware, he was able to continue on his anti-cheese rampage. Bob decided that the best way to save his hippo would be to go to the source of the cheese. Bob realized he didn't know what the source was, but he heard that the old quark knew. Bob set off to visit the old quark.
#8
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 06:00 PM
Bob spent hours searching, until he stumbled across an old man sitting on a bench in the park. Noting that this man resembled the father-time sketch he had seen in jail, he walked up to the man and asked, "Are you the old quark?" The old man, being hard of hearing replied, "Who's an old quack!" And with that, Bob was chased out of the park by the old man and his wooden cane.
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#9
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 06:33 PM
Unfortunately the cane went into a state of cardiac arrest and fell over onto the ground with a clatter.
Currently making Possession 2, a game where you play as a ghost and possess your enemies.
#10
- And another one bites the dust. Another one down...
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 09:23 PM
The man was devasted and stop chasing Bob. Bob buys a pizza at...
'It seems people have a taste for hell in the morning. ';
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.
#11
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 10:40 PM
...iHop, where he discovers this "pizza" was all syrupy and blueberry and gross. Suddenly, he realizes (actually, the waiter hit him over the head and told him) that he had no money to pay for his meal. Thus, Bob...
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#12
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 10:52 PM
used his experience from the set-them-ablazing factory to dispatch of the waiter. Surprisingly, he set the waiter ablazing. For his heroics, Bob was awarded a tank from the army. With his tank, he decided to drive over to Canada to look for camels.
#13
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Posted 19 September 2004 - 11:37 PM
Not finding any camels, Bob drove his tank off a cliff into the Atlantic Ocean. After swimming back to shore (the wolves having taught Bob to dog-paddle during his youth), Bob ran into an insurance salesman from Montreal who tried to sell him replacement coverage for wall-to-wall shag carpeting. Bob declined and the salesman took off on a quest to buy a hat that slightly resembled a rock-shaped beaver. Bob shrugged and walked to a local adult bookstore.
-Pufer
-Pufer
"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha
#14
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 08:09 AM
Bob didn't know about the dark side of adult bookstores, for the wolves had never told him. He asked the attendant for books involving finding cheese, and the attendant got scared that Bob was some kind of kinky sex crazed psycho, and called the cops.
Tempting a sleeping giant with a pin isn't the same as hurling a whale at an irritated giant. -Avatara
"Hey, I'm not the one who wanted Gay Sex to become a moderator." -Avatara
"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>
"Hey, I'm not the one who wanted Gay Sex to become a moderator." -Avatara
"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>
#15
- And another one bites the dust. Another one down...
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 09:10 AM
The cops asked him to come over later that night.
'It seems people have a taste for hell in the morning. ';
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.
#16
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 10:11 AM
Being the type of trusting individual that he was, Bob showed up at the police station later that night only to find that it had been burnt to the ground around twenty minutes prior to his arrival. He poked around and found the unmistakable signs of another crime perpetrated by militant squirrels.
-Pufer
-Pufer
"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha
#17
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 03:45 PM
He also found a crazed policeman, sitting in the rubble and sucking his thumb.
"I will fight said squirrels," quoth the policeman.
"I will fight said squirrels," quoth the policeman.
Currently making Possession 2, a game where you play as a ghost and possess your enemies.
#18
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 07:06 PM
Having seen this, Bob, whose name we will later find to be Bob, sat on a rather large tortoise that was, unexplainably, sitting close by. The tortoise didn't appreciate this, and said "You're a moth." Presumably, if we knew why the tortoise had said that we'd know a lot more about the world. But we don't. So we don't. The tortoise then...
Hyperbole is the best thing ever!
#19
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 07:53 PM
...bit Bob's butt so hard he was unable to sit down for days. Injured, Bob walked into a flower shop and bought some roses to complement his pet cactus.
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#20
- And another one bites the dust. Another one down...
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 09:56 PM
Arriving home and giving the flowers to his pet cactus only to find his living room in shambles from his giant tiger fluffy. Bob sighed, feeding the tiger had caused him to go bankrupt, he didn't mind that, when the tiger sprayed, it was manageable, the livingroom was not to bad, but his Mint Boba Fett Action Figure was entirely different story. The tiger was going down one way or another, but the doorbell rang, it was...
'It seems people have a taste for hell in the morning. ';
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.
#21
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 10:10 PM
...the pizza guy, looking to rent the Lord of the Rings Trilogy. Bob handed him a rotting peach and told him to ask the hobo on the corner. Suddenly...
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#23
- Ehhhhh...no?
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 10:22 PM
...promptly exploded.
"For a writing to be a writing it must continue to 'act' and to be readable even when what is called the author of the writing no longer answers for what he has written..."
Jacques Derrida, "Signature Event Context"
Jacques Derrida, "Signature Event Context"
#25
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Posted 20 September 2004 - 11:35 PM
Bob, not thinking much of the confetti or the fact that the pizza cartel had figured out where he lived, gathered up his pet cactus and his lucky box of plastic straws and moved next door.
-Pufer
-Pufer
"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha
