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#501 Fleet Admiral Darkk

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Posted 02 January 2001 - 11:41 PM

Alexander Seriopin, who uses the wave motion cannon to toast all other contenders. He promptly has Washington declared a "Federal Emergency Area" and has FEMA put all who "work" at Microsoft into a sweatshop making levels for Myth 2. He then orders Majestic 12 to bring in Hek Met, who has respawned again and is somewhere in Africa, finally relieved of internal waste...

[I guess you'd have to know your conspiracies to know what MJ12 is, but other people might know FEMA. Ah heck, just play some Deus Ex and you'll know it.]

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William Darkk, head of the Darkklight Entrepenurial Federation
Your cargo or your life!!!

"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois

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#502 Rogan

Lurker supreme

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 08:56 AM

*tumbleweed blows across the screen*

*agent JC Denton suddenly walks across the screen, turns and says: "So...you think you know better than FEMA what to do with this month`s Ambrosia shipment?" He turns again and walks away.*

This topic is...eh...oh, **** it.

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I`m a bomb technician. If you see me running...try to keep up.

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This is the War Room.

#503 Talon Karrde

EUnuch

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 10:44 AM

JC denton gets blasted by one of those EVUL guard robots...you know....
The robot walks off...

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"Sergeant, you can't fire that in here! We're indoors!"
"Only until I pull the trigger, Captain!" -Terry Pratchett

conform now. conform now. conform now.
differences cause conflicts. conforming is happiness.
join us. express your commonality. copy and paste.

Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn.

#504 OctoberFost

deposed despot

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 11:20 AM

Alexander Seriopin is sitting in his office when he hears a loud noise behind him.

He sees a bright flash of light. When the light clears, a lizard with a sniper rifle appears. The lizard respawned in his office.

Alexander Seriopin never knew what hit him. Within a second he was on the floor dead with his head in several pieces.

The Lizard then reclaimed his title of Philospher-King and continued to rule the country.

------------------
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htjyang ol-warone, bal-jajea ki'kaemel

#505 Guest_Skippy_*

Group: Guests

Posted 03 January 2001 - 12:54 PM

And there was much rejoicing.

yay…yay…

#506 Guest_Skippy_*

Group: Guests

Posted 03 January 2001 - 12:57 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Skippy<k>:
"Ku-ru-ku-ku-ku-ku-KU!"
"Ku-RU-ku-ku-ku-ku-koo."

Only you canadiens who know who Bob and Doug are will get that…

#507 Fleet Admiral Darkk

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 03:19 PM

Alex reginerates at a pattern buffer in Africa, and teams up with Hek Met to subjugate Earth using the Gateship and...

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William Darkk, head of the Darkklight Entrepenurial Federation
Your cargo or your life!!!

"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois

Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
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#508 OctoberFost

deposed despot

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 03:52 PM

...the remains of Mecha Strom Thurmond.

But they needed a new head and better technology...

So, they...

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htjyang ol-warone, bal-jajea ki'kaemel

#509 Idiot_box

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 04:46 PM

turned to Apple Computers, of course.

Steve Jobs gave both of them the equipment they desired, and they moved in on the Philosopher--king's headquarters.

The lizard would have none of it, however. The lizard...

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"Loyalty to a petrified opinion never broke a chain or freed a human soul."
--Samuel Clemons

"Speak softly and carry a big stick." --Theodore Roosevelt
+++++++++++++++++
"The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."
-Socrates

#510 OctoberFost

deposed despot

Group: Imported Banned Users
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Joined: 11-January 00

Posted 03 January 2001 - 05:57 PM

The Lizard ran away quickly, while Mecha Strom Thurmond destroyed his residence.

All was sad. Until...

------------------
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htjyang ol-warone, bal-jajea ki'kaemel

#511 Captain Pharris

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 08:42 PM

The House of Representatives, jealous of the Senate's Mecha-Majority Speaker, build their own Mecha-Congressman, and the two of them go at it.

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NEW NAME FOR THE DREADNOUGHT
The Hard-Boiled Egg
Why?
Because she cant be beaten!

#512 Fleet Admiral Darkk

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Posted 03 January 2001 - 10:36 PM

Mecha-Thurman, however, using his advanced computational abilities (and a new mind named Traxis courtesy of Seropin) kills the Mecha-Representative by having a rather dangerous battleroid sneak-attack it from the rear with a fusion pistol, overloading its electronics. The battleroid is put back into suspended animation, as per regulations, as it isn't an important character.

------------------
William Darkk, head of the Darkklight Entrepenurial Federation
Your cargo or your life!!!

"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois

Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
macgamer.net

#513 OctoberFost

deposed despot

Group: Imported Banned Users
Posts: 7,534
Joined: 11-January 00

Posted 04 January 2001 - 12:08 AM

Mecha Strom Thurmond kills the rest of the house as it pitifully scurries for help.

Only Batman can save us now!

Weeks pass. Batman is nowere to be found.

Strom goes on a rampage, burning down cities and killing people. All is sad.

Becasue Mecha Strom Thurmond is made with Apple technology, only one man can stop him now: Bill Gates....

------------------
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htjyang ol-warone, bal-jajea ki'kaemel

#514 Idiot_box

conspirator

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Posted 04 January 2001 - 02:26 AM

The entire planet thanks their deities (if they believe in one/many/etc.) that the Lizard is not a man, but a reptile, and that Bill Gates is dead, killed by his own software (Mecha Windows had a fatal error while Gates was using his laptop...really fatal). The lizard simply gets a really big sniper rifle, and takes down Mecha Strom. The world rejoices.

------------------
"Loyalty to a petrified opinion never broke a chain or freed a human soul."
--Samuel Clemons

"Speak softly and carry a big stick." --Theodore Roosevelt
+++++++++++++++++
"The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."
-Socrates

#515 Captain Pharris

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Joined: 31-January 00

Posted 04 January 2001 - 09:06 PM

Unfortunately, with Strom dyeing, Newt Gingritch sees his chance, and makes a grab for power. Strom, seeing this, refuses to die, and with one last lurch of strength, roll over, crushing Newt from the neck down, Mecha Strom Thurmond backs his brain up onto a secret computer, and sureptituously dies.

Meanwhile, Newt Gingritch Grafts his head onto Big birds body, and vows revenge...

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NEW NAME FOR THE DREADNOUGHT
The Hard-Boiled Egg
Why?
Because she cant be beaten!

#516 Fleet Admiral Darkk

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 03:12 PM

Unfortunatly, Big Bird dies of shame from harboring such pure stupidity and evil. Hek Met and Seropin argue over the division of Earth, and agree to have a duel between Tycho and the Gateship to settle things forever.

High above in a geocynchronius orbit, the mighty 5km gateship and 2km Pfhor corvette go at it with massive weapons of mass destruction...

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William Darkk, head of the Darkklight Entrepenurial Federation
Yes, I hate Cantharans. Does the trophy on the wall make it too obvious?

"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois

Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
macgamer.net

#517 Idiot_box

conspirator

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 05:19 PM

Durandal laughs at the duel above. After all, no matter who wins the battle, he can't lose.

The lizard goes back to sitting on a warm desert rock for awhile.

However, danger brews far away. The gecko respawns. With an evil glint in its eye, it begins scurrying toward the lizard.

Meanwhile, the polar ice caps begin to melt due to the increase in radiation, carbon dioxide, etc. from all the fighting going on. Certain parts of certain continents sink, like Florida.

------------------
"Loyalty to a petrified opinion never broke a chain or freed a human soul."
--Samuel Clemons

"Speak softly and carry a big stick." --Theodore Roosevelt
+++++++++++++++++
"The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."
-Socrates

#518 Macintosh Man

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 06:59 PM

Is this stupid (yet stangely funny) thing STILL going?

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Long Live Apple! Long Live the Mac!
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#519 Fleet Admiral Darkk

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 08:21 PM

[yes]
A shirokilator hits the earth, sending much of the new water through and out the other side. Tycho is doing a great job, until an EMJ ball knocks him loopy. The gateship, however, is taken out by a LRM from...

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William Darkk, head of the Darkklight Entrepenurial Federation
Yes, I hate Cantharans. Does the trophy on the wall make it too obvious?

"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois

Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
macgamer.net

#520 Guest_f_a_t_m_*

Group: Guests

Posted 05 January 2001 - 09:09 PM

...hell!!! BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

#521 OctoberFost

deposed despot

Group: Imported Banned Users
Posts: 7,534
Joined: 11-January 00

Posted 05 January 2001 - 10:10 PM

Meanwhile, the Gecko discovers Newt Gingritch's head without a body and has pity on him. The Gecko and Newt merge their DNA, creating a half Gecko half Newt Gingritch monster.

Batman sees this and feels disturbed. He feels compeled to do something. Before he can even stand up, he dies. The Gecko/Newt Gingritch monster strangled him with his long, sticky tounge. Then batman was eaten with savagry only capable of a republican.

As the world mourns the death of Batman...

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Bah bah black sheep have you any wool? Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full.
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htjyang ol-warone, bal-jajea ki'kaemel

#522 Guest_Skippy_*

Group: Guests

Posted 05 January 2001 - 11:01 PM

…the New Gingritch/Gecko monster starts running towards the lizard, wanting revenge. However, the lizard forsees this, and pulls out a boombox. When the New Gingritch/Gecko monster comes close enough, the lizard puts 1Way on at full blast. The New Gingritch/Gecko monster cannot stand this, and is blown backwards by the huge rapping sound waves. He flies halfway around the worldl, crashing through any buildings that he flies through.

Meanwhile, there was a cheese tile. And his name was…

#523 Avatara

Guardian

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 11:01 PM

...the commander of the gateship suddenly leaves the bridge...heading for the restroom. Unfortunately, he can't understand the human language and misreads the instructions. The world rejoices as they see a bright flash light up the sky...until they realized the flash was due to the gecko causing the sun to go nova...

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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."

"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.

*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel

#524 Avatara

Guardian

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 11:02 PM

...the cheese tile's name strangely enough was Andrew...

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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."

#525 Fleet Admiral Darkk

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Posted 05 January 2001 - 11:26 PM

The gateship, however, jams the Nova, making it perminatly inactive. Earth is saved. The Gecko slams into Hillary Clinton and dies of shock upon finding itself inside her head...

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William Darkk, head of the Darkklight Entrepenurial Federation
Yes, I hate Cantharans. Does the trophy on the wall make it too obvious?

"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois

Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
macgamer.net