Help
I claim this topic in the name Count Altair. All other people passing must pay a toll.
==========> <=> <===============|
Please enter on the left lane if you're leaving the topic, enter into the right lane if you're going to another board. Charges are as follows:
Left lane: 30 cents
Right lane: $9
Thankyou, and please do not clog the laneways.
Thankyou citizens of the Ares webboard
MultiQuote
#2
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Posted 04 August 2001 - 06:09 AM
Here's my 9 bucks, and 27 for the next three folks. Enjoy!
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—Joolzman5, that guy with the spikey red hair.
Those who say money is the root of all evil don't have any.
“That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass — and I’m just the one to do it.”
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—Joolzman5, that guy with the spikey red hair.
Those who say money is the root of all evil don't have any.
“That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass — and I’m just the one to do it.”
#3
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- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 04 August 2001 - 06:57 AM
Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™ is having trouble processing your request. Request forwarded to Count Altair Inc™ Central Request Processing Committee.
From: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
To: Request Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Money Commendation
Priority: Class 3
An individual named Joolzman5 has passed the topic-toll located at Ares Trash Talk, which charges imaginary cash for passing by the topic. This individual did a) Pay 9 dollars (noted as appendix a) and
payed a further 27 dollars (noted as appendix . The extra 27 dollars payed were specially requested to pay for the other members. We at Count Altair Inc™ do expressely forbid such acts of charity, kindness and other good things. The money is heretofore committed to Gathering Division, Count Altair Inc™ with dividends going also to Processing Division, Request Processing Committee, Central Committee, and Seconday Processing Committee (all subsidiaries of Count Altair Inc™). This is marked down and stamped priority class 3.
From: Request Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Commendation
Priority: Class 4
In reference to notice A#23019, we signal our acceptance to your a) taking the money and dispersing it among the divisions of Count Altair Inc™, and forwarding it to this committee. Processing Division, a subsidiary of Count Altair Inc™ is hereby commended. In reference to appendix a) and B)'s existence, please ensure it does not happen again. I leave it to you to decide measure preventing charitible donations. As part of our long-term investment plan, the money due Gathering Division, Central Committee, and Secondary Processing Committee have been forwarded instead to Request Processing Committee, that will deal with it in benefits regarding Count Altair Inc™. This is marked down with the stamp: class 4.
From: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
To: Request Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Money Commendation
Priority: Class 3
An individual named Joolzman5 has passed the topic-toll located at Ares Trash Talk, which charges imaginary cash for passing by the topic. This individual did a) Pay 9 dollars (noted as appendix a) and
payed a further 27 dollars (noted as appendix . The extra 27 dollars payed were specially requested to pay for the other members. We at Count Altair Inc™ do expressely forbid such acts of charity, kindness and other good things. The money is heretofore committed to Gathering Division, Count Altair Inc™ with dividends going also to Processing Division, Request Processing Committee, Central Committee, and Seconday Processing Committee (all subsidiaries of Count Altair Inc™). This is marked down and stamped priority class 3.From: Request Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Commendation
Priority: Class 4
In reference to notice A#23019, we signal our acceptance to your a) taking the money and dispersing it among the divisions of Count Altair Inc™, and
forwarding it to this committee. Processing Division, a subsidiary of Count Altair Inc™ is hereby commended. In reference to appendix a) and B)'s existence, please ensure it does not happen again. I leave it to you to decide measure preventing charitible donations. As part of our long-term investment plan, the money due Gathering Division, Central Committee, and Secondary Processing Committee have been forwarded instead to Request Processing Committee, that will deal with it in benefits regarding Count Altair Inc™. This is marked down with the stamp: class 4.
#5
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- Joined: 05-February 01
- Location:Lookout Mountain, Tennessee, USA
Posted 04 August 2001 - 12:25 PM
I'll go ahead and post so that Joolzman pays my stay. 
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-Cap'n Skyblade
-Battle for Sol - Episode II: The Unfinished War-
[url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/TheUnfinishedWarMap.jpg"]Map[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/human/HumanConfederationWeapons.html"]Human Confederation Weapons[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/pirate/PirateWeapons.html"]Pirate Weapons[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/alien/AlienWeapons.html"]Alien Weapons[/url]
[url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/human/HumanConfederationShipyard.html"]Human Confederacy Shipyard[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/pirate/PirateShipyard.html"]Pirate Shipyard[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/alien/AlienShipyard.html"]Alien Empire Shipyard[/url]
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-Cap'n Skyblade
-Battle for Sol - Episode II: The Unfinished War-
[url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/TheUnfinishedWarMap.jpg"]Map[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/human/HumanConfederationWeapons.html"]Human Confederation Weapons[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/pirate/PirateWeapons.html"]Pirate Weapons[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/alien/AlienWeapons.html"]Alien Weapons[/url]
[url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/human/HumanConfederationShipyard.html"]Human Confederacy Shipyard[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/pirate/PirateShipyard.html"]Pirate Shipyard[/url] | [url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/bfs2/alien/AlienShipyard.html"]Alien Empire Shipyard[/url]
Graphics Portfolio - old collection of assorted 2D and 3D work
#6
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- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 12,036
- Joined: 05-July 00
- Gender:Male
Posted 04 August 2001 - 12:50 PM
Muahaha...I can drive in circles around your lanes, and past the toll booths without ever paying a cent!
*clogs up the left lane with heavy debris and impassible obstacles*
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
*clogs up the left lane with heavy debris and impassible obstacles*
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#7
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- Group: Moderators
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- Joined: 05-July 00
- Gender:Male
Posted 04 August 2001 - 12:55 PM
*test, ignore this post*
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#8
- Member
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- Group: Members
- Posts: 565
- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 04 August 2001 - 06:53 PM
From: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Obligation
Priority: Class 2
In regards to the toll-boothing operation at Ares Trash Talk, certain individuals have behaved in an unacceptable manner. These offences are a) Pyro yelling and insulting the toll-takers from afar, a man passed claiming to have had his toll payed for (though this was not the case and the man was refused entry), and then proceeded to break the doors down and go past anyway (doors are repaired now, but the cost came close to $89) and c) a man clogged the laneway with wreckage, and d) the man drove around the tollbooth and inside without paying any fine. We are ready to enforce martial-law in our toll-booths, please signal your acceptance. We are in dire straits here. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
From: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Annihilation
Priority: Class 2
In regards to your appendixes a, b, c, and d, these are very bad offences, and perhaps enough to warranty the death penalty. From now on, erect a hidden force field around and inside the toll booths. Any individuals running around, throwing stuff, or even insulting will have their plans squashed. The forcefield comes with this message, simply press here <0> to have it unfold around you. In future, please bother Central Committee. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
To: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Obligation
Priority: Class 2
In regards to the toll-boothing operation at Ares Trash Talk, certain individuals have behaved in an unacceptable manner. These offences are a) Pyro yelling and insulting the toll-takers from afar,
a man passed claiming to have had his toll payed for (though this was not the case and the man was refused entry), and then proceeded to break the doors down and go past anyway (doors are repaired now, but the cost came close to $89) and c) a man clogged the laneway with wreckage, and d) the man drove around the tollbooth and inside without paying any fine. We are ready to enforce martial-law in our toll-booths, please signal your acceptance. We are in dire straits here. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.From: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Divison, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Annihilation
Priority: Class 2
In regards to your appendixes a, b, c, and d, these are very bad offences, and perhaps enough to warranty the death penalty. From now on, erect a hidden force field around and inside the toll booths. Any individuals running around, throwing stuff, or even insulting will have their plans squashed. The forcefield comes with this message, simply press here <0> to have it unfold around you. In future, please bother Central Committee. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
#9
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- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 12,036
- Joined: 05-July 00
- Gender:Male
Posted 04 August 2001 - 09:32 PM
Oh yeah? You are trying to hinder my free movement amendment by erecting forcefields??? Well, they obviously aren't working!
*walks into the toll booth and robs Count of all his money before leaving calmly and unhindered.*
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
*walks into the toll booth and robs Count of all his money before leaving calmly and unhindered.*
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#10
- Member
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- Group: Members
- Posts: 384
- Joined: 31-October 00
Posted 04 August 2001 - 09:40 PM
Enters right lane and pays 9 U.S. Confedrate dollars.
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Creator of the soon to be submitted plugin for ares "Earth's Journey Back To The Stars".
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Creator of the soon to be submitted plugin for ares "Earth's Journey Back To The Stars".
The guy with no artistic ability what so ever...
Ares plugins to date: Earth's Journey Back To The Stars, Scenario Contest and Cantharan vs. Ishiman.
Ares plugins in development: Star Trek: Ares, Viva La Resistance.
Ares plugins to date: Earth's Journey Back To The Stars, Scenario Contest and Cantharan vs. Ishiman.
Ares plugins in development: Star Trek: Ares, Viva La Resistance.
#11
- Guardian
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- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 12,036
- Joined: 05-July 00
- Gender:Male
Posted 04 August 2001 - 09:51 PM
*A complete stranger walks down the right lane and pays 9 dollars worth of monopoly money.*
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
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"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#12
- Member
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- Group: Members
- Posts: 565
- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 04 August 2001 - 11:14 PM
From: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Progress report
Priority: Class 4
In regards to the toll-boothing operation in the Ares Trash Talk area, I must report that a certain amount of money was stolen by an unkown hooded individual that somehow bypassed our forcefields. The man left unhindered, but police arrived on the scene and have confirmed a positive I.D. Apart from this minor inconvenience, I must report a profit of $18. Regarding to the break and entry, I must humbly request another forcefield. This is marked down with the priority class 4.
From: Count Altair El Alemein, Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Requiem
Priority: Class 1
Central Committee has recently received a report from Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™ pertaining a failed force-field which you supplied. All faulty equipment must be checked against successful equipment after a fault is identified, which you did not do immediately after the accident. I would also request that you produce a working forcefield and thus prevent these annoying (and profit taking!) accidents from occurring. This marks a long line of successive failures on your part. I hope I don't need to tell you what that could mean if you continue to fail me. This marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Re: Requiem
Priority: Class 4
Secondary Processing Committee is deeply sorry, but the fault was not due to us. Investigation was delayed primarily because we received a report from Processing Division (after the robbery) implying human error was the cause of the accident. The power wasn't turned on. Secondary Processing Committee again apologises but will fulfill Processing Division's request for a new forcefield regardless.
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Progress report
Priority: Class 4
In regards to the toll-boothing operation in the Ares Trash Talk area, I must report that a certain amount of money was stolen by an unkown hooded individual that somehow bypassed our forcefields. The man left unhindered, but police arrived on the scene and have confirmed a positive I.D. Apart from this minor inconvenience, I must report a profit of $18. Regarding to the break and entry, I must humbly request another forcefield. This is marked down with the priority class 4.
From: Count Altair El Alemein, Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Requiem
Priority: Class 1
Central Committee has recently received a report from Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™ pertaining a failed force-field which you supplied. All faulty equipment must be checked against successful equipment after a fault is identified, which you did not do immediately after the accident. I would also request that you produce a working forcefield and thus prevent these annoying (and profit taking!) accidents from occurring. This marks a long line of successive failures on your part. I hope I don't need to tell you what that could mean if you continue to fail me. This marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Re: Requiem
Priority: Class 4
Secondary Processing Committee is deeply sorry, but the fault was not due to us. Investigation was delayed primarily because we received a report from Processing Division (after the robbery) implying human error was the cause of the accident. The power wasn't turned on. Secondary Processing Committee again apologises but will fulfill Processing Division's request for a new forcefield regardless.
#13
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- Joined: 16-January 00
Posted 04 August 2001 - 11:26 PM
/me comes up to the toll booth in a human HVD, piratical-looking crewers leaning out the windows. All the crewers point tommy guns at the toll man as the photopulse takes out the forcefields.
"Put this on my mobstercard, k?"
"S-s-s-s-sure!!!"
"Thanks, suckers!"
[mobstercard is my pun on armed robbery and mastercard]
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Formerly-Rampant Human-Coded AI
"Put this on my mobstercard, k?"
"S-s-s-s-sure!!!"
"Thanks, suckers!"
[mobstercard is my pun on armed robbery and mastercard]
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Formerly-Rampant Human-Coded AI
"In literature as in love we are astounded by what is chosen by others." Andre Maurois
Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
macgamer.net
Onii7/Frinkruds and his funky forums
macgamer.net
#14
- Member
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- Group: Members
- Posts: 565
- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 04 August 2001 - 11:48 PM
From: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Urgency
Priority: Class 1
Help help! We are being robbed by darkly swaithed pirates! We cannot hold out, unless you arrive quickly, all the money will be gone! Help!!!!! This is the toll-booth located in Ares Trash Talk!!!
From: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Equipment Shortages
Priority: Class 1
We have recently received a request for help from one of our operations in Ares Trash Talk, marked class 1. Unfortunately, the teleporter in that region no longer functions due to excessive cost cuts in the Ares forums. We respectively ask for a one-way teleporter that does not require a destination apparatus. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Cost Effectiveness
Priority: Class 2
A request for a teleporter without destination apparatus was sent to us from Company Protectorate, the reason given a rogue attack on one of our tollboothing operations in the Ares forums. A teleporter without a destination apparatus is an extremely expensive piece of equipment, and we have sought your approval for teleporting it to Company Protectorate headquarters. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Re: Cost Effectiveness
Priority: Class 1
Are you an idiot? All requests forwarded with a priority class 2 from the Company Protectorate headquarters must be fulfilled without delay! This simple piece of understanding seems to have evaded you, at a time when one of our most valuable outposts is under attack. If the outpost is destroyed as a result of your incompetence, so will your promotion cycle. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Teleportation Equipment
Priority: Class 1
I have received you message and teleported the necessary equipment. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Reinforcements
Priority: Class 1
In regards to your distress call, we are preparing to teleport armies across to the Ares forums using a teleporter without the need for destination apparatus. Please do not be alarmed by our arrival.
From: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee
Stamp: Complaints
Priority: Class 4
At 0300 hours 3 days ago, our toll booths in the Ares Trash Talk forums came under attack by a band of pirates. We signalled Company Protectorate for assistance but by the time they arrived, the pirate band had looted our toll booth and taken $18 dollars in monopoly and confederation credits. This is unacceptable on the part of the staff of Processing Division, whose lives were risked during the brief melee. We humbly ranks and prioritise this priority class 4.
To: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Urgency
Priority: Class 1
Help help! We are being robbed by darkly swaithed pirates! We cannot hold out, unless you arrive quickly, all the money will be gone! Help!!!!! This is the toll-booth located in Ares Trash Talk!!!
From: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Equipment Shortages
Priority: Class 1
We have recently received a request for help from one of our operations in Ares Trash Talk, marked class 1. Unfortunately, the teleporter in that region no longer functions due to excessive cost cuts in the Ares forums. We respectively ask for a one-way teleporter that does not require a destination apparatus. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Cost Effectiveness
Priority: Class 2
A request for a teleporter without destination apparatus was sent to us from Company Protectorate, the reason given a rogue attack on one of our tollboothing operations in the Ares forums. A teleporter without a destination apparatus is an extremely expensive piece of equipment, and we have sought your approval for teleporting it to Company Protectorate headquarters. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Re: Cost Effectiveness
Priority: Class 1
Are you an idiot? All requests forwarded with a priority class 2 from the Company Protectorate headquarters must be fulfilled without delay! This simple piece of understanding seems to have evaded you, at a time when one of our most valuable outposts is under attack. If the outpost is destroyed as a result of your incompetence, so will your promotion cycle. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Teleportation Equipment
Priority: Class 1
I have received you message and teleported the necessary equipment. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Reinforcements
Priority: Class 1
In regards to your distress call, we are preparing to teleport armies across to the Ares forums using a teleporter without the need for destination apparatus. Please do not be alarmed by our arrival.
From: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee
Stamp: Complaints
Priority: Class 4
At 0300 hours 3 days ago, our toll booths in the Ares Trash Talk forums came under attack by a band of pirates. We signalled Company Protectorate for assistance but by the time they arrived, the pirate band had looted our toll booth and taken $18 dollars in monopoly and confederation credits. This is unacceptable on the part of the staff of Processing Division, whose lives were risked during the brief melee. We humbly ranks and prioritise this priority class 4.
#15
- Invigilator
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- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 7,372
- Joined: 25-January 00
- Location:New York, New York
Posted 05 August 2001 - 01:47 AM
From: Chief Headquarters, Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Hostile Takeover
Priority: Class 1 AA Override
Due to recent events lowering the public share float of Count Altair Inc™ to approximitely 72.87 Fictional US Dollars per share, Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ has purchased 34 000 shares in aforementioned company. The resulting 51% of shares held gives Angel Conglomerate Industries control of the Board of Directors for aforementioned company, and thus all subsideries including, but not restricted to, Toll Booth operation in the Ares Trash Talk area. Be advised auditors will be initiating activities shortly.
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Sundered Angel,
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Hostile Takeover
Priority: Class 1 AA Override
Due to recent events lowering the public share float of Count Altair Inc™ to approximitely 72.87 Fictional US Dollars per share, Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ has purchased 34 000 shares in aforementioned company. The resulting 51% of shares held gives Angel Conglomerate Industries control of the Board of Directors for aforementioned company, and thus all subsideries including, but not restricted to, Toll Booth operation in the Ares Trash Talk area. Be advised auditors will be initiating activities shortly.
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Sundered Angel,
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
Sundered Angel,
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
#16
- Member
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 565
- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 05 August 2001 - 02:22 AM
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair In™
Stamp: Hostile Takeover
Priority: Class 1
I have received notice that Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ has purchased 34,000 shares in our company at 72.87 cents a share. How could you let this happen?!!! Idiot, now we're owned by Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ and it's dastardly chairman, Sundered Angel! My company ruined, my life in pieces, and it's the torture rack from now on. This is marked down and prioritised class 1.
From: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Hostile Takeover
Priority: Class 1
We have just received the news ourselves, but all is not lost. As you may remember, you did donate a considerable sum to the whitehouse Republican party, and it's leader George Bush. You also have blackmail files on George Bush worth several billion 'special' favours. I believe we can browbeat the whitehouse into illegalising the recent transaction and acquiring the assets of Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™. Yours faithfully, captain Calculas. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair Inc™
To: The Whitehouse, USA
Stamp: What are friends for?
Priority: Class 1
Hi old chum. He he, how about that footy game last week? Boy, we are such great friends. Anyway, down to business. My boss, Count Altair, you know, the funny guy keeps mumbling 'Ishouldhaveasmuchkarmaasdarkk'? Well, anyway, he like's the good life of free trade and privatisation... heh, you see? He's no different from us! Oh, wait a sec... he is. Sometimes, well, it's late, and he, I don't know why, gets these violent urges. He doesn't mean what he does when this comes over him. I mean, he could literally do anything, I mean *anything* and he has considerable resources so sometimes it can be quite... touching... to the other parties. Anyway, I know you'll know what do to in regards to the recent takeover eh eh? This is taken down and marked class 'what are friends for', 1.
From: The Whitehouse, USA
To: Count Altair, Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Resolution
Priority: Class 1
You'll be glad to know the takeover by Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ has been illegalised by the Supreme Court, thanks to considerable pressure on my part, and the decision reversed. In compensation for the illegalised takeover, the court also decided to reward Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ in compensation, to Count Altair Inc™. This is taken down and marked priority class 1.
From: Count Altair, Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Restructuring
Priority: Class 1
Privatise Count Altair Inc™. Immediately. This is taken down and marked priority class 1.
To: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair In™
Stamp: Hostile Takeover
Priority: Class 1
I have received notice that Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ has purchased 34,000 shares in our company at 72.87 cents a share. How could you let this happen?!!! Idiot, now we're owned by Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ and it's dastardly chairman, Sundered Angel! My company ruined, my life in pieces, and it's the torture rack from now on. This is marked down and prioritised class 1.
From: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Hostile Takeover
Priority: Class 1
We have just received the news ourselves, but all is not lost. As you may remember, you did donate a considerable sum to the whitehouse Republican party, and it's leader George Bush. You also have blackmail files on George Bush worth several billion 'special' favours. I believe we can browbeat the whitehouse into illegalising the recent transaction and acquiring the assets of Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™. Yours faithfully, captain Calculas. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair Inc™
To: The Whitehouse, USA
Stamp: What are friends for?
Priority: Class 1
Hi old chum. He he, how about that footy game last week? Boy, we are such great friends. Anyway, down to business. My boss, Count Altair, you know, the funny guy keeps mumbling 'Ishouldhaveasmuchkarmaasdarkk'? Well, anyway, he like's the good life of free trade and privatisation... heh, you see? He's no different from us! Oh, wait a sec... he is. Sometimes, well, it's late, and he, I don't know why, gets these violent urges. He doesn't mean what he does when this comes over him. I mean, he could literally do anything, I mean *anything* and he has considerable resources so sometimes it can be quite... touching... to the other parties. Anyway, I know you'll know what do to in regards to the recent takeover eh eh? This is taken down and marked class 'what are friends for', 1.
From: The Whitehouse, USA
To: Count Altair, Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Resolution
Priority: Class 1
You'll be glad to know the takeover by Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ has been illegalised by the Supreme Court, thanks to considerable pressure on my part, and the decision reversed. In compensation for the illegalised takeover, the court also decided to reward Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ in compensation, to Count Altair Inc™. This is taken down and marked priority class 1.
From: Count Altair, Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Beureau of External Affairs, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Restructuring
Priority: Class 1
Privatise Count Altair Inc™. Immediately. This is taken down and marked priority class 1.
#17
- Guardian
-
- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 12,036
- Joined: 05-July 00
- Gender:Male
Posted 05 August 2001 - 11:19 AM
From: National Guard Headquarters, US Government.
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Illegial actions
Priority: Class 1
We've discovered recently that you have in your posession three illegal objects. 1.) A forcefield surrounding your tollbooth that was outlawed in the Alien Act of 1995. 2.) A one-way teleporter that threatens the national security of the nation. 3.) A parked truck in a no-parking zone.
This is in violation of the federal law. Not only will these objects be confiscated, but you will be required to give up control of Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ and pay a $1,000,000 fine to compensate. Failure to comply will result in shutting down your company...permenantly. (We have full judicial and congressional support in this matter.)
Have a nice day!
------------------
"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Illegial actions
Priority: Class 1
We've discovered recently that you have in your posession three illegal objects. 1.) A forcefield surrounding your tollbooth that was outlawed in the Alien Act of 1995. 2.) A one-way teleporter that threatens the national security of the nation. 3.) A parked truck in a no-parking zone.
This is in violation of the federal law. Not only will these objects be confiscated, but you will be required to give up control of Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™ and pay a $1,000,000 fine to compensate. Failure to comply will result in shutting down your company...permenantly. (We have full judicial and congressional support in this matter.)
Have a nice day!
------------------
"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#18
- EUnuch
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 2,204
- Joined: 11-September 00
- Gender:Male
- Location:Vienna
Posted 05 August 2001 - 12:39 PM
*LOL! This topic is getting to wierd even for me! 
*
Pays...uhhh...whoever owns the company now 9$.
------------------
'Is that what I think it is?'
'What?'
'A big orange swirly thing in space!'
-Red Dwarf
*Pays...uhhh...whoever owns the company now 9$.
------------------
'Is that what I think it is?'
'What?'
'A big orange swirly thing in space!'
-Red Dwarf
conform now. conform now. conform now.
differences cause conflicts. conforming is happiness.
join us. express your commonality. copy and paste.
Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn.
differences cause conflicts. conforming is happiness.
join us. express your commonality. copy and paste.
Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn.
#19
- Member
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 384
- Joined: 31-October 00
Posted 05 August 2001 - 06:55 PM
That was my truck. Sorry about that.
Pays 9 Canadian dollars and enters right lane
------------------
Creator of the soon to be submitted plugin for ares "Earth's Journey Back To The Stars".
Pays 9 Canadian dollars and enters right lane
------------------
Creator of the soon to be submitted plugin for ares "Earth's Journey Back To The Stars".
The guy with no artistic ability what so ever...
Ares plugins to date: Earth's Journey Back To The Stars, Scenario Contest and Cantharan vs. Ishiman.
Ares plugins in development: Star Trek: Ares, Viva La Resistance.
Ares plugins to date: Earth's Journey Back To The Stars, Scenario Contest and Cantharan vs. Ishiman.
Ares plugins in development: Star Trek: Ares, Viva La Resistance.
#20
- Member
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 565
- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 05 August 2001 - 07:23 PM
From: Tax Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Report
Priority: Class 4
The tax report for the toll-boothing operation in the Ares Trash talk forum:
Money Generated: $72
Stolen: $18
Confiscated Items: 1 Teleporter without the need for destination apparatus: $1,000,000
1 Shield defense system: $500,000
1 Parked Truck parking fee: $18
Company Fine: $1,000,000
------------------------------
Balance: -$2,499,964
This is set down and stamped priority class 4.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: All members of the Ares boards
Stamp: Insolvency
Priority: Class 3
Attention members of the Ares webboards, the toll-boothing operation in the Ares Trash talk forum is generating negative amounts of money! Count Altair Inc™ cannot subsist with such huge debts in it's businesses, and unless someone donates 2,499,964 by tomorrow, Count Altair Inc™'s Toll-boothing operation will be closed down. This is marked down and stamped priority class 3, for general advisement.
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Report
Priority: Class 4
The tax report for the toll-boothing operation in the Ares Trash talk forum:
Money Generated: $72
Stolen: $18
Confiscated Items: 1 Teleporter without the need for destination apparatus: $1,000,000
1 Shield defense system: $500,000
1 Parked Truck parking fee: $18
Company Fine: $1,000,000
------------------------------
Balance: -$2,499,964
This is set down and stamped priority class 4.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: All members of the Ares boards
Stamp: Insolvency
Priority: Class 3
Attention members of the Ares webboards, the toll-boothing operation in the Ares Trash talk forum is generating negative amounts of money! Count Altair Inc™ cannot subsist with such huge debts in it's businesses, and unless someone donates 2,499,964 by tomorrow, Count Altair Inc™'s Toll-boothing operation will be closed down. This is marked down and stamped priority class 3, for general advisement.
#21
- Member
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 384
- Joined: 31-October 00
Posted 05 August 2001 - 08:20 PM
From: Brookeview Technologies Inc™ Technology Grant Office
To: Count Altair Inc™ Financial Office
Stamp: Technologies Grant
Priority: Class 1
Brookeview Technologies Inc™ is proud to inform you that you have been granted $4,499,964 for investment in new force field and shielding technology as well as a state of the art toll booth defense system. Be advised that this grant can only be given if all employees of Brookeview Technologies Inc™ are allowed free passage through the Count Altair Inc™ toll booth located in the Ares Trash Talk section of the Ambrosia web board.
If you accept Brookeview Technologies Inc™ will continue to fund the Count Altair Inc™ toll both division for the next 3 years in exchange for advertising space on all toll booths.
Brookeview Technologies Inc™
The best supplier of technology related stuff in the universe.
------------------
Creator of the soon to be submitted plugin for ares "Earth's Journey Back To The Stars".
[This message has been edited by brookeview (edited 08-25-2001).]
To: Count Altair Inc™ Financial Office
Stamp: Technologies Grant
Priority: Class 1
Brookeview Technologies Inc™ is proud to inform you that you have been granted $4,499,964 for investment in new force field and shielding technology as well as a state of the art toll booth defense system. Be advised that this grant can only be given if all employees of Brookeview Technologies Inc™ are allowed free passage through the Count Altair Inc™ toll booth located in the Ares Trash Talk section of the Ambrosia web board.
If you accept Brookeview Technologies Inc™ will continue to fund the Count Altair Inc™ toll both division for the next 3 years in exchange for advertising space on all toll booths.
Brookeview Technologies Inc™
The best supplier of technology related stuff in the universe.
------------------
Creator of the soon to be submitted plugin for ares "Earth's Journey Back To The Stars".
[This message has been edited by brookeview (edited 08-25-2001).]
The guy with no artistic ability what so ever...
Ares plugins to date: Earth's Journey Back To The Stars, Scenario Contest and Cantharan vs. Ishiman.
Ares plugins in development: Star Trek: Ares, Viva La Resistance.
Ares plugins to date: Earth's Journey Back To The Stars, Scenario Contest and Cantharan vs. Ishiman.
Ares plugins in development: Star Trek: Ares, Viva La Resistance.
#22
- Guardian
-
- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 12,036
- Joined: 05-July 00
- Gender:Male
Posted 05 August 2001 - 10:00 PM
From: Pirates Inc.™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Thanks
Priority: Class 1
Thank you for your generous...um..."donation" of 5 million credits my elite team has just diverted from your accounts. Rest assured, it will be put to "good use!." Hahaha...
***Warning! Virus detected attached to message!***
P.S. I hope you enjoy my little gift to you. I'm honored that y-AHF!I#&!5971HILAFHIOA871
14GRA1941@%JAH*!P(A*T)!&$85AFJPA71018371240JAFLKASD909124780AFJLKAS90A8F07UF8013JLAUJIO13
AFH813HOO1I24HUIO1JLK1H5UO0135LIHU12IL412HJ4IOO12841208AFAHJHOIOFIHA01890A7FOHALFIOHAOYAH
HAHAHAHABETTERLUCKNEXTTIMEYOUSUCKER!910140781J5IO1589015J1O;23490157098901835J1U35OLH8916
------------------
"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Thanks
Priority: Class 1
Thank you for your generous...um..."donation" of 5 million credits my elite team has just diverted from your accounts. Rest assured, it will be put to "good use!." Hahaha...
***Warning! Virus detected attached to message!***
P.S. I hope you enjoy my little gift to you. I'm honored that y-AHF!I#&!5971HILAFHIOA871
14GRA1941@%JAH*!P(A*T)!&$85AFJPA71018371240JAFLKASD909124780AFJLKAS90A8F07UF8013JLAUJIO13
AFH813HOO1I24HUIO1JLK1H5UO0135LIHU12IL412HJ4IOO12841208AFAHJHOIOFIHA01890A7FOHALFIOHAOYAH
HAHAHAHABETTERLUCKNEXTTIMEYOUSUCKER!910140781J5IO1589015J1O;23490157098901835J1U35OLH8916
------------------
"I'm a controversial figure. My friends either dislike me or hate me."
"Sometimes I get confused whether I'm posting on ATT or in the War Room. But then I remind myself: If it's moderators acting scatter-brained and foolish, then it's the War Room*.
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
-- From the memoirs of Sundered Angel
#23
- Member
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 565
- Joined: 26-January 01
Posted 06 August 2001 - 01:13 AM
From: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Piracy
Priority: Class 2
I regret to inform the board that 5,000,000 dollars was diverted from our official network. This fantastic loss underscores our recent lack of shield generators, and half-pay we have been forced to subsist on for the past few weeks. If this continues, the personnel operating the toll-booth in trash talk will go on strike. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Delay
Priority: Class 3
We have just received a generous donation from Brookeview Technologies Inc™, $4,499,964 to be exact. You will put $2,000,000 to good use by building 2 high-quality shield generators and a teleporter without the need for destination apparatus. Please comply in short order. This is stamped and marked priority class 3.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Reimbursement
Priority: Class 3
Generous donations from Brookeview Technologies Inc™ have led to a profit-taking in this year's quarter-cycle report. Specifically, you will now advertise Brookeview Technologies Inc™ products and allow free passage to all respected Brookeview Technologies Inc™ personnel. Also, expect 2 new shield generators of high quality class very soon. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2
From: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Transfer
Priority: Class 1
Due to advances in miniaturisation, the 2 new forcefields due to Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™ will be invisible and totally unaffected by material things, including photopulses and/or antimatter beams. The forcefields also come with unlimited battery power, and run entirely automonously. Press here <0> to have it unfold around you. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Transfer
Priority: Class 1
Click here <0> to receive the teleporter-without-the-need-for-destination-apparatus by less advanced forms of teleportation. From now on, all emergencies from the toll-booth at Ares Trash Talk will be met with immediate reinforcements. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
The new toll-booth:
........./<><><><>..............
==========> <=> <===============| |§|Buy Brookeview!|§|
.........<><><><>/..............
To: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Piracy
Priority: Class 2
I regret to inform the board that 5,000,000 dollars was diverted from our official network. This fantastic loss underscores our recent lack of shield generators, and half-pay we have been forced to subsist on for the past few weeks. If this continues, the personnel operating the toll-booth in trash talk will go on strike. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Secondary Processing, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Delay
Priority: Class 3
We have just received a generous donation from Brookeview Technologies Inc™, $4,499,964 to be exact. You will put $2,000,000 to good use by building 2 high-quality shield generators and a teleporter without the need for destination apparatus. Please comply in short order. This is stamped and marked priority class 3.
From: Central Committee, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Reimbursement
Priority: Class 3
Generous donations from Brookeview Technologies Inc™ have led to a profit-taking in this year's quarter-cycle report. Specifically, you will now advertise Brookeview Technologies Inc™ products and allow free passage to all respected Brookeview Technologies Inc™ personnel. Also, expect 2 new shield generators of high quality class very soon. This is marked down and stamped priority class 2
From: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Transfer
Priority: Class 1
Due to advances in miniaturisation, the 2 new forcefields due to Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™ will be invisible and totally unaffected by material things, including photopulses and/or antimatter beams. The forcefields also come with unlimited battery power, and run entirely automonously. Press here <0> to have it unfold around you. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
From: Secondary Processing Division, Count Altair Inc™
To: Company Protectorate, Count Altair Inc™
Stamp: Transfer
Priority: Class 1
Click here <0> to receive the teleporter-without-the-need-for-destination-apparatus by less advanced forms of teleportation. From now on, all emergencies from the toll-booth at Ares Trash Talk will be met with immediate reinforcements. This is marked down and stamped priority class 1.
The new toll-booth:
........./<><><><>..............
==========> <=> <===============| |§|Buy Brookeview!|§|
.........<><><><>/..............
#24
- Member
-
- Group: Members
- Posts: 675
- Joined: 12-January 00
Posted 06 August 2001 - 02:41 AM
*sometime during the night somebody duct tapes trout to the tollbooth windows, and tosses frozen chunks of shaving cream into the booth. Which, by the way expand tremendously when they thaw... 
*
I pass through and pay 9 lira. Hey, what's with all the shaving cream and the trout?
------------------
Madness takes it's toll; Please have exact change.
*I pass through and pay 9 lira. Hey, what's with all the shaving cream and the trout?
------------------
Madness takes it's toll; Please have exact change.
#25
- Invigilator
-
- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 7,372
- Joined: 25-January 00
- Location:New York, New York
Posted 06 August 2001 - 03:50 AM
From: Geneva Headquarters, Angel International Industries Ltd™
To: US Headquarters, Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™
Stamp: Recent Appellate Ruling
Priority: Class 2
Due to recent travesties involving direct Presidential Order, Angel International Industries Ltd™ hereby finds its United States Subsidary, Angel Congomerate Industries Ltd™ to have spent less than its required 8.2% quota on local political lobbying. Hereby the holding is in breach of franchise contract, and is liquidated under Condition 38b)iii) of the aforementioned agreement. No worker's compensation will be awarded.
From: "Unaffiliated Subsidaries", Angel International Industries Ltd™
To: "The People's Liberation Front of America"
Stamp: Condition of Continued Funding
Priority: Class 3
The Board of Directors has seen fit to add an additional clause to your current contract, hitherto to be known as Clause 18d). This clause sets forth, as a condition of continued funding, that the contractee, known only as "The People's Liberation Front of America", is to provide support for the guerilla movements presently conducting operations against the Ares Trash Talk branch of Count Altair Inc™, with views to the eventual liquidation of said branch. As usual, payment will be in unmarked, nonsequential bills.
------------------
Sundered Angel,
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
To: US Headquarters, Angel Conglomerate Industries Ltd™
Stamp: Recent Appellate Ruling
Priority: Class 2
Due to recent travesties involving direct Presidential Order, Angel International Industries Ltd™ hereby finds its United States Subsidary, Angel Congomerate Industries Ltd™ to have spent less than its required 8.2% quota on local political lobbying. Hereby the holding is in breach of franchise contract, and is liquidated under Condition 38b)iii) of the aforementioned agreement. No worker's compensation will be awarded.
From: "Unaffiliated Subsidaries", Angel International Industries Ltd™
To: "The People's Liberation Front of America"
Stamp: Condition of Continued Funding
Priority: Class 3
The Board of Directors has seen fit to add an additional clause to your current contract, hitherto to be known as Clause 18d). This clause sets forth, as a condition of continued funding, that the contractee, known only as "The People's Liberation Front of America", is to provide support for the guerilla movements presently conducting operations against the Ares Trash Talk branch of Count Altair Inc™, with views to the eventual liquidation of said branch. As usual, payment will be in unmarked, nonsequential bills.
------------------
Sundered Angel,
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
Sundered Angel,
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
The One and Only
Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy
