Ambrosia Software Web Board: The Officer's Club Bar #6 - Ambrosia Software Web Board

Must be some disturbingly buff cronies if they can successfully break Cicion's legs...

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"Humans are hicks."
- Paff's Law
It explains so much...

They're ex-cronies now HEH HEH HEH !

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Oh, so it is another bug hunt then...

More where they came from. Now, if you would kindly pass back my head...

*pistgavin puts his head back on his neck with a dull "shhlopp", and continues to drink expensive cocktails all night, ordering yet more cronies to bandage broken legs, clean up shattered glass, and stand by the door, beating up anyone who doesn't have a tie.*

You see, gangland law dictates that a mob boss can only be killed by an enemy assassin...

--gav

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It's one thing to love somethin, but if you don't shower it with money then just don't talk to me. -- Paster Richards, GTA Vice City, VCPR
--SARZ, WZ. --

Quote

That can be arranged. I have the ability to morph into any creature, and I have think this is the best way to complete the assasination:



Edit: picture didn't show up...
Edit2: Why??? the image should work... just click [url="http://"http://hot.ee/ed2kest2/pildid/soldier.jpg"]here[[/url] to see it...
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[This message has been edited by Trah (edited 06-07-2003).]

[This message has been edited by Trah (edited 06-07-2003).]

OV comes in and orders a Greenyblue, forgetting how long it's been since he had one

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Oh i'm not addicted, it's a hobby

LCA's fourth clone pays for OV's GreenyBlue®©™.
As the one hundred millionth GreenyBlue®©™ to be drunk this is a landmark in liquid refreshment history...

OV also gets a free super GreenyBlue®©™ Corp. plastic senti-tie.

(Oh, and er a certificate)

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Oh, so it is another bug hunt then...

w00t! Free drink!

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Oh i'm not addicted, it's a hobby

*One crony barely survived Anic's strike team and manages to crawl back to the luxury spacecruiser he and pistgavin arrived in. The door is open when he gets there, and looking inside he sees the bodies of the five thugs that stayed behind to guard it strewn around, two with throats slashed open, one with a deep wound in the chest, and one with a broken neck. He starts to crawl away when a familiar Phylydion drops down from inside the ship in front of him.*

Hi there. You must be the one who hit my left leg.
"I...I.... We broke both your legs! I saw it!"
Oh, give me a break. Have you morons EVER studied Phylydion anatomy? Lucky you haven't, I guess. If you'd aimed an inch higher you would've broken it. But I can pop my leg there when I wish, and pop it back.

*The thug starts to hobble away. Silently Cicion runs past him and back into his bar. The thug suddenly realizes his spinal nerves have been severed, and falls to the floor in a dead heap. Cicion reenters the bar, grabbing pistgavin.* Pleasure doing business with you. *He hurls the crimeboss out of the barroom and into the docking bay. PG enters his ship, stepping over his dispatched guards, accesses his computer and finds that his life savings are now owned by the Phylydion government. He grumbles and takes off.*

That ought to teach him. *Starts serving drinks. As soon as PG's ship reaches a few klicks out, Cicion reaches into his shirt and hits a button. The ship detonates into an immense fireball* That ought to teach him even more. Thanks a lot, Anic, for your help. *Gives Anic a free drink.*

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-Traek Cicion, barkeep extraordinaire
"PS: If nothing's working around here, it's because I'm laughing so hard."
-Durandal

Ah yes, but your crimes against me are null.

*pistgavin did indeed escape in a life pod, with vintage wine on ice and silk coaches. He simply goes back to his secret mansion on Trivus-7 and collects the money from his protection rackets, which add back up to twice his life savings. He then presses a button and fifteen goons rise from the floor.

"Okay boys, I think it's time to teach him a lesson."
"Sure thing boss."
"We can't get him, but we can get the bar..."

TO BE CONTINUED...
--gav

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It's one thing to love somethin, but if you don't shower it with money then just don't talk to me. -- Paster Richards, GTA Vice City, VCPR
--SARZ, WZ. --

The Hagrabiscuit vending machine, a severely harmless looking device, (unless you actually eat some of it's products, particularly the Scouse Meat Pies) farts a brief alarm tone, and considering the new goons to be a threat to business decides to sterilise the area of them with the despatch of an iHKV. They cease to exist in a puff of sensibility.
The vending machine resumes its commercial activities.
No one upsets the status quo in a Beeblebrox Enterprises world, especially not when profits are concerned.
.
.
.
Deep within the Octarine hell dimensions the departed souls of the dispatched goons are getteted by Scrofula* who swings it's scythe and sends them on their merry way.
.
.
.
DEATH is inevitable, and varied, and rather fond of cocktails, sometimes...
.
.
.
(*not even being worthy of the Death of Rats)

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Oh, so it is another bug hunt then...

In a dark mansion on Trivus-7, pistgavin contemplates the situation...

Only 73,502,189,540,476,586,115,486 goons left. What to do...

Send 4 along to break his legs again, and the rest can help keep the drinks on ice.

--gav

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It's one thing to love somethin, but if you don't shower it with money then just don't talk to me. -- Paster Richards, GTA Vice City, VCPR
--SARZ, WZ. --

[This message has been edited by pistgavin (edited 06-13-2003).]

You can go hug a llama, do something productive.

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"What we do not know, we cannot begin to understand."

I don't really think it'll be productive, but I'll take your advice...

*pistgavin hugs a llama*

"Awww, it's quite cute really."

*Llama bites pistgavin*

"Well, there goes my fingers. Goooooons! Deal with this beast."

*Llama proceeds to kill three hundred goons then escapes to the bar for a quick breather*

--gav

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It's one thing to love somethin, but if you don't shower it with money then just don't talk to me. -- Paster Richards, GTA Vice City, VCPR
~~ SARZ, WZ ~~

The bar goes silent as a heavy cruiser slides into the docking bay. Then everything resumes to normal...

Then skyfox undid his cloaking sheild. "Uh, whoever runs this place... Get me a... Whatever you serve..."

Skyfox notices that everyone is staring at him, and calmly pulls out a nuke grenade and sets it on the table before him. "I've been gone too long into deep space, it's let me overcome my fear of strange people"

/Proceeds to drink whatever it is.

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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."-Albert Einstein

*the three fighter pilots quietly slip away to avoid being nearby if the nuke goes off*

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"Humans are hicks."
- Paff's Law
It explains so much...

The waiter brings over a glass and gently sets it down on the table.

Suddenly the red light comes on on the grenade. 5, 4, 3, 2...
*pop*
Skyfox ducks, and water goes everywhere.
Sitting up and survaying the soaked walls and wet people that now inhabeted the bar, skyfox stated. "Well, i think thats the last time i'll ever try using those water grenades agian..."

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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."-Albert Einstein

Here, try one of these,
LCA slips Skyfox a Luxury GreenyBlue®©™ with frosted edges...

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Oh, so it is another bug hunt then...

*Unfreezes as user comes back from a weeklong trip.* What've I missed? *Sees the bar soaked in water, remnants of various fights, explosions, and the like, and shrugs.* Nothing, as usual.

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-Traek Cicion, barkeep extraordinaire
"PS: If nothing's working around here, it's because I'm laughing so hard."
-Durandal

Hmm... *Takes long sip of the GreenyBlue®©™*

"Zippy!!!" skyfox exclaims. And proceeds to down the drink in a single gulp. His eyes grow large, and he becomes jittery. "H-h-how mmuch caffeinn dddoess this hhhave??"

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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."-Albert Einstein

"The Frosted...?",
LCA pauses, counts fingers, takes a sip of own GreenyBlue®©™
"...about sixteen cups of really hot coffee, or two Caffeine Paks®©™ worth,"
glances innocently at Sky Fox
"Still, no worries, right!"

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Oh, so it is another bug hunt then...

"N-none wwu-whatsoever!!" /downs 5more glasses of GreenyBlue®©™
"Wow, I really need to try using this in combat!!"

/Skyfox goes and takes off in his heavy cruiser, and the vessel dissapears into the void for about 50seconds. Then just as everything was getting back to semi-normal, the cruiser comes back. The effect of the GreenyBlue®©™ is clearly noticable in skyfox's driving skills. *WHAM* the bar rocks with the impact in the docking bay.

Skyfox rushes back in, way too hyperactive for everyones own good. "Sorry, i forgot that i already killed every last baddie in the universe."

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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."-Albert Einstein

Hmmm, barkeep, better give that man a BlueyGreen®©™ to help him sober down...

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Oh, so it is another bug hunt then...

Of course. *Serves up a BlueyGreen©™*

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-Traek Cicion, barkeep extraordinaire
"PS: If nothing's working around here, it's because I'm laughing so hard."
-Durandal

A bearded man in a long black cloak emerges through a small hole in the wall across from the bar. The glint of a long steel sabre can be seen as the man saunters across the room.

"Yar, ye must be Cicion, I'm DanMan, serve me up one of dem BlueyGreens©™* if ye please"

The first sip causes DanMan to swerve violently into a nearby table, his long sabre poking an unsuspecting patron to the floor. "Yar!" he growls, "I love dis stuff!!" He procedes to sit at a shadowy corner for several hours, ordering more drinks every so often. Eventually, he gets unsteadily to his feet, stumbles drunkenly over to the bar, and slurs, "Yar, put that on me Consortium Account!"

The bartender looks bemused, and ovbiously has no idea what this man is talking about

"Oh yess," DanMan drawls, "and here's a little somey-thing for ye services this evening"

He tosses Cicion a credit chip with several thousand credits on it, about 700 times more than what his drinks cost him, before he stumbles out the door towards the docking bay.

Just another random patron at The Bar™

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In the begining, there was EV. Single Player. Now, we have been delivered from isolation.
[url="http://"http://www.stonefire.net"] The Hideout[/url]: Multiplayer EV!!

Always a pleasure, sir. Come back any time, I'll give ya one on the house.

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-Traek Cicion, barkeep extraordinaire
"PS: If nothing's working around here, it's because I'm laughing so hard."
-Durandal