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The Officer's Club Bar #2

#176 User is offline   Joveia 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 12:23 AM

Suddenly Joveia floats into the bar, and steals the Dr.Pepper's from Darkks' hands as they are handed to him/them.

He then douses this inferior drink all over Darkks' shiny black suits' and proceeds to crush the tin cans which he throws at their faces.

'You have mortally offended me sir.' He says, still floating up in the air as a giant balloon. 'Let us duel!'

And then explodes.

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There are only 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
There are only 3 kinds of people; those who can count, and those who can't.

#177 User is offline   Fleet Admiral Darkk 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 02:45 AM

The Darkk from the 2nd RPG takes the pieces of Joviea, stuffs them into a reasonably intact Dr Pepper can, and tosses it out an airlock. Joviea comes back together and bursts out of the can, only to be set upon by zerbilites, which tear off chunks of him.

The Darkks and the cloaked dude watch from the windows, sipping vanilla/Dr Pepper ice cream floats.

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#178 User is offline   Joveia 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 05:38 AM

Joveia re-materialises inside the ship, and utilises a phaser set on stun to disable the men.

Joveia goes over, takes their clothes so they're utterly naked, then throws the clothes as feeding for the zerbilities. He then leaves them in the officer's lounge, packed with people, and explodes.

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There are only 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
There are only 3 kinds of people; those who can count, and those who can't.

#179 User is offline   Overrider720 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 09:10 AM

OV hinds under his stool and covers his eyes not wanting to view the nastiness

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#180 User is offline   Athena 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 01:18 PM

Athena, who just witnessed all that happened, turns back to her drink and quietly mumbels to herself, "looser." Posted Image

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#181 User is offline   Fleet Admiral Darkk 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 01:27 PM

Unbenknownst to Joveia, Vylae don't wear clothes (being birds), and the cloaked figure regenerated his clothes instantly after Jov pulled them off.

The Darkks from the first 2 RPGs grab tablecloths, talk a little, then leave.

Suddenly, the TV on the bar counter blares "Man named Joviea implicated in immense scandal with the government of Australia. Million credit reward offered."

Joviea regenerates. All the bounty hunters in the bar (over 500) look at Joviea. Joviea draws the stunner. The no-power light on it's on.

Joviea runs. Hundreds of bounty hunters of dozens of races pile on Jov, and an all out brawl begins.

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Formerly-Rampant Human-Coded AI

[This message has been edited by Fleet Admiral Darkk (edited 10-07-2001).]
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#182 User is offline   Captain Pharris 

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Posted 07 October 2001 - 06:27 PM

Three Captaqin Pharris's confir with one-another about which Darkk is which. One is a rough man in his late thirties, wearing a beat up old bomber jacket covered with insignias and blast marks. The second is a frail young person projected from the eye of a nearby Audemedon Droid. The third is a prim, well dressed Post-Captain in the Union of Worlds Star Navy. Across from them sits a hollow-looking figure clothed in many fine robes and a green hood that hides his face. He is bent over an Ishiman-style PDA. Next to him are two others. One bears an implant over one eye, and wears a plain blue jumpsuit without insignia save for a nametag on which is written "Bob". The other is looking around cautiously. He is wearing well worn travelling clothes and heavy, tattered leather hiking boots. The table is covered with drinks from all over the galaxy, rangeing from pan-galatic gargleblasters to old port to warm tea and icewater.

The booths around them are filled with men and aliens from the Barbarrossa, the Xerxes and the ISN 9154775, all of whom are celebrating in some way or another.

Captain Pharris from the first RPG looks at the TV, then at his men, who immediately put down their drinks and stand. Some move to the door, while others spread out around the bar, making sure that nobody else tries to make a move. Pharris walks up to the bar next to Joveia and slaps some money on the table.

"So, how about a drink?"

Joveia looks at him and tries to vanish, but can't, for some reason. Outside the window, a large eggbeater glows ominously. Bob smiles to himself.

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NEW NAME FOR THE DREADNOUGHT
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Why?
Because she cant be beaten!

#183 User is offline   Joveia 

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Posted 08 October 2001 - 03:38 AM

Joveia inflates and flies high in the domed room, so no one, not even the bounty hunters can touch him.

'Ha ha ha ha ha fools, I am invincible!'

And then explodes.

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There are only 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
There are only 3 kinds of people; those who can count, and those who can't.

#184 User is offline   Taeskor Cicion 

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Posted 08 October 2001 - 10:26 AM

*Garrion Retoe walks through the door, carrying an unconcious Greccha.* "Hey, Traek, I found this fellow snooping around in your storeroom."

Hmm, that means there are probably more around. Anyone care to accompany me on a Greccha hunt? *Unsheathes Keutae, swirls around too fast to see, then re-sheathes it.*

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-Traek Cicion of the Taeskor
"What sort of man is he?"
"Oh, he's just like any other man, only more so."
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#185 User is offline   Captain Skyblade 

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Posted 08 October 2001 - 09:11 PM

Skyblade walks into the bar wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket as disguise. He orders a 200oz. Dr. Pepper and takes a look at all the *strange* people in the bar...

Posted Image


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#186 User is offline   Athena 

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Posted 08 October 2001 - 09:12 PM

Athena, who was sitting quietly and quite pleasently, was very abruptly bothered by a drunkerd who obviously had one to many drinks. He staggered towards her until he was almost in her face and then said, " Hey sugar. wanna.." < burp> "... Uhh..." < fart> "... pardon me... uh.. dance?" by now the smell and grotesque of the drunk had wiped out any concious sign of Athena and she fell head first on the ground unconcious.

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#187 User is offline   Overrider720 

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Posted 09 October 2001 - 02:20 PM

OV gets up punches and kicks the drunk man out of the bar and sets up a huge fan that blows everything out of the bar. OV pours water on athens's face to wake her up

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#188 User is offline   Captain Skyblade 

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Posted 09 October 2001 - 04:00 PM

*Skyblade steps up security in the bar, and becomes the head officer. All his security guards are armed with Dr. Pepper cannons, ready to take down any additional idiots and drunks*

Posted Image


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#189 User is offline   Mike 

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Posted 09 October 2001 - 10:58 PM

Ooooooooo! getting close to 200 posts in this board. Better have someone reopen this as "The Officer's Club Bar #3"

Well, I'm back at the Ares boards so let's have something to talk about.

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#190 User is offline   Joveia 

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Posted 10 October 2001 - 03:22 AM

*The TV is interrupted by a special announcement*

'Ladies and gentlemen, we have shocking news. Earlier today, government sanitation officials found traces of the notorious virus Caligulas XX-1, in the Dr. Pepper factories. This virus has been going for some time, and all Dr. Pepper's in the universe have been infected with it. There is no vaccine, no cure, and no chance of survival. The victim dies a slow and torturous death, suffering intense emotions and hatred. This takes effect 30 minutes after drinking the drink. Goodbye, and please, don't contact us in such an emergency. As I _clearly_ stated, there is no cure, and no way to survive. Avians are most vulnerable, and female bartenders. Thankyou people, and goodnight.'

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There are only 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
There are only 3 kinds of people; those who can count, and those who can't.

#191 User is offline   Athena 

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Posted 10 October 2001 - 07:24 AM

Athena, who just saw the news, quickly checked her pulse on her arm. She knew there was no way to be the same again after the virus took its affect. she looked around for someone to blame, and then she saw captain skyblade, with an ever proud and jocky look on his face. She raced over to him, she raced with heroism, strength, might, and longing to live and drink pure dr. pepper agian. captain Skyblade who was calmly sitting on a bench, who was fealing no presure at all, suddenly felt <bang>. Athena had just ramed into him, and as she lay there ontop of him she began to chew of his neck. Blood spilled everywhere, until Athena stood up off of him and realized that she just killed one of her friends. She began to run crazy around the bar, fanatically askind if she really did kill him, until she fell flat on her knees crying and.... and..... <puff> she suddenly found herself waking up from off of the floor. Athena quickly looked around the bar for Captain Skyblade. And then finally she saw him, she again raced over to him, but this time threw herself flat on the ground, grabbed his leg in between her arms and began to weep bitterly. The next thing everybody began to notice was only a dainty female grabbing for Captian skyblade and muttering such things as, " Oh... Please, I'll do anything. I'm sooo sorry, I, don't want to hurt you....." She continued on like this for quite some time, until Captain skyblade got a rather evil grin that slithered across his face. He looked at Athena, and calmly said, "Oh, my dear child. Do not cry, for I shall forgive you on one account, which is to honor me and serve me for the rest of your life." Athena who was overwhelmed with forgiveness stood up and was just about to shake on it, until she realized that when she attacked him it was only a dream. She paused for a moment and then saw what Skyblades plan was. <slap> Skyblade now had a very colorfull handprint on his face and Athena quietly walked back to her table with Overrider.

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Falling inlove is when he lays in your arms and wakes up in your dreams...

#192 User is offline   Captain Skyblade 

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Posted 10 October 2001 - 01:52 PM

Skyblade rubs his face from the hard slap Athena delievered, wondering why on earth he got it. Oh well, Skyblade was the protector of Dr. Pepper anyway. Posted Image

*Skyblade delcares war on the roach juice empire, also known as pepsi. Recent news reports indicate that roach juice agents poisoned the most recent shipments of Dr. Pepper throughout the galaxy. But such actions will not be forgotten. Skyblade gathers a fleet of Ishiman warships, with the Heavy Destroyer Triton Corsair in the lead.*

Security is also tightened in the bar. In the meantime, Skyblade orders another 200oz. Dr. Pepper. Posted Image


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#193 User is offline   Fleet Admiral Darkk 

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Posted 10 October 2001 - 02:56 PM

Another special announcement on the TV:

Please disreguard the prior announcement. A mallicious hacker known only as "Joviea" had cracked the medical alert network. The United Nations has offered a bounty of $300,000,000 US for the severed head of Joviea.

The Darkks, the cloaked man, and a few other Dr Pepper fans snicker as a horde of knife-wielding bounty hunters converge on Joviea.
After a few minutes, the cloaked man reaches into the fray, pulls out Joviea, and reattaches Joviea's head.
"What say we let bygones be bygones?"
"Sure."

[Let's end this, it's got too silly even for the bar.]

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#194 User is offline   Captain Skyblade 

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Posted 10 October 2001 - 03:43 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Fleet Admiral Darkk:

[Let's end this, it's got too silly even for the bar.]


Heh, if you think this is bad, try checking out some of the Escape Velocity Boozerama Bars. Posted Image




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[url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/alien_invaders/main.html"]Alien Invaders[/url] | [url="http://"http://home.cfl.rr.com/aresev/"]The Legion[/url] | [url="http://"http://www.evula.com/"]EVula's Lair[/url] | [url="http://"http://www.meowx.com/"]Meowx Design[/url]
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#195 User is offline   Mike 

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Posted 10 October 2001 - 05:47 PM

Mike mutters to himself, "Good thing I only drink cream soda. Heh"

*TV crackles on*
Another update to our last two reports, the original report was intended for the following beverages: Grey Matter Juice, Tang, Cream Soda,and Krixilplig. I'm Stone Philips *gasp* Good night

"Oh...dang"

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#196 User is offline   Joveia 

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Posted 11 October 2001 - 01:40 AM

Joveia laughs quietly as he moves the atomic bomb along the disused railtrack a hundred metres under the bar. Oh yes, the TV commercial and his holographic hardlight copy had provided ample distraction.

He moved the giant circular thing into place, just under the bar.

Then he ran, as fast as possible, to the exit of the railway track. Then he took the car to the airport. Then he took the airport to the spaceport at Houston. Then he took the spacecraft to the hypergate in orbit around Earth. Then he entered the Tau Ceti system.

His operative back on Earth entered the railway track, and set the bomb to explode in 30 seconds.

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There are only 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
There are only 3 kinds of people; those who can count, and those who can't.

#197 User is offline   Overrider720 

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Posted 11 October 2001 - 02:28 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Joveia:
[i]'Ladies and gentlemen, we have shocking news.  Earlier today, government sanitation officials found traces of the notorious virus Caligulas XX-1, in the Dr. Pepper factories.  This virus has been going for some time, and all Dr. Pepper's in the universe have been infected with it.  There is no vaccine, no cure, and no chance of survival.  The victim dies a slow and torturous death, suffering intense emotions and hatred.  This takes effect 30 minutes after drinking the drink.  Goodbye, and please, don't contact us in such an emergency.  As I _clearly_ stated, there is no cure, and no way to survive.  Avians are most vulnerable, and female bartenders.  


OV drinks 10,000,000,000 DP's


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You have been overriden by Overrider. Prepare to die evil scum! -Me
rookie's smiles:[url="http://"http://www.ezboard.com/help/help_howto_useemoticons.html"]Cool Smiles[/url][url="http://"http://community.theunderdogs.org/smiley/gallery.htm"]Cooler Smiles[/url]
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Why?

#198 User is offline   Captain Skyblade 

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Posted 11 October 2001 - 07:45 PM

Skyblade and his security team find the bomb sitting out in a railroad track just outside the bar, and disarm it. They then re-arm it after re-programming the weapon, and roll it down to Jeveia's house...

*Skyblade whipes the dust from his hands and goes inside for another Dr. Pepper*


------------------
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the Confederation Graphics Expansion Set: Coming soon
[url="http://"http://members.home.net/e-gamerguy1/ev/alien_invaders/main.html"]Alien Invaders[/url] | [url="http://"http://home.cfl.rr.com/aresev/"]The Legion[/url] | [url="http://"http://www.evula.com/"]EVula's Lair[/url] | [url="http://"http://www.meowx.com/"]Meowx Design[/url]
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#199 User is offline   Joveia 

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Posted 12 October 2001 - 12:26 AM

Unfortunately for Skyblade, the bomb had only 5 seconds left when he re-armed it.

What can I say? He got quite far.

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There are only 3 kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
There are only 3 kinds of people; those who can count, and those who can't.

#200 User is offline   Mike 

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Posted 12 October 2001 - 07:02 PM

As every body is sitting down in the bar Mike stands up faster than a first grader needing to go to the bathroom and falls over dead. Sucks for him. Then the Nuke explodes and every body dies.

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Hey! Jesus Loves You! :P
"They've got us surrounded. Good! Now we can fire in any direction. Those bastards won't get away this time!"- A variation of a quote by Lt. Gen. Chesty Puller at the Chosin Reservoir

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