Yay, I'm so pleased that you both read the whole thing! ^
_^ Within hours of me posting it, too! :
D I have the awesomest friends <3
Quote
You know, some days I wonder how the NPCs ever tolerated that band of unruly 'heroes' camping out in the tavern.
I know, right? ^_
^ At least Icel won't be back in Cythera!
Quote
Wasn't expecting the bit with the Ronin, but it totally makes sense!
Combining Adriana's plot with the Ronin's was the only idea I ever had for her being able to find & follow Avatara. Originally I wanted her to seek out Moonshadow, hang out with her in her remote house in the middle of nowhere, and eventually learn about her lost husband. One day early on in writing this story, I spent
hours reading old stories, trying to figure out where Moonshadow lived! @_@ (Spoiler alert: No one ever said. Ever
) Finally I gave up and decided I'd just be vague about it, but then, how would Adriana ever find Moonshadow's house if nearly no one knows where she lives? So I gave up on the whole thing and moved on to the Ronin's barracks. In a way, this is better because it wastes less time in Cythera (it can't be an Avriana story without Avatara). If I was going to re-work this story, which I won't, I think I'd change Adriana's motives for running away from Pnyx. Rather than looking for "adventures," she'd be specifically looking for the foreign healer-heroes, so that she can learn about alternative healing magics. Then after befriending Moonshadow, she'd try to get in on Wolmark's spell. I'd still probably need the scene with Katerei, for Adriana to find out that Avatara wasn't in Cythera anymore.
Quote
Adriana is so mean to Kat!
That's true! It's not like I invented the animosity between them though :
x
Quote
I like this whole scene.
Before writing, I had three ideas I wanted to include to hint at Avriana. One of them was Avatara singling Adriana out in greeting, despite DF and Saria being with her. Another one was Avatara pressuring Adriana to play music instead of whatever Saria or DF wanted her to do. And the other one was Avatara going to the city without telling Adriana or inviting her. (Okay, that last one was less of a hint to the pairing and more of a hint that they're still not all
that into each other. It kinda supports the ship though, because Adriana realizes she is a bit smitten.) Later on, I added that I wanted them to hug after killing Icel.
Quote
A little bit of me wants to be happy for Adriana, since she is the protagonist and all, but I can't condone her stealing Av from Kat. >_>
To be fair, she hasn't stolen him (yet). She's just keeping him company while Cythera is inaccessible. Although my vision for their future is that they give up on Cythera and decide to get married themselves :
D
Quote
It's cool how you fit healing magic in with theories from the game, considering I made it all up in Hym with absolutely no knowledge of how healing works in Cythera. :V
I have no idea how healing works in real life, so I just made something up that's probably totally unbelievable @_@ I figured if Avatara had an obvious health problem, like an infection or something, he'd figure out how to heal it himself. I don't know.
Quote
I didn't remember any of the stuff about vitality potions or Saria's addiction, but that's actually a neat plot point.
Partway through writing the story, I started worrying about how I'd write the fight scene, so I took a break for over a week and re-read Shadow Games and Witch Hunt. Reading about Saria starting to become addicted to the vitality potion in Witch Hunt, I decided to add that in. I thought it'd be fun to show her sneaking around, brewing up potion when the boys are away (& brewing outside so the smell won't linger in the house), hiding her extra potions, etc. I didn't originally intend for her to have withdrawals and Adriana to find out about the severity of her addiction, but it seemed easier to write that way (and then I got to have Adriana have a chance to go to the city too ^_
^).
The fight scene, ugh. Fight scenes are so boring! I completely just skipped over the whole thing in my "proof-reading" because it's too boring to read. I didn't want the battle to be "too easy," but you know what? There's something to be said for ridiculously overpowered characters! Then you can just kill all the bad guys immediately and not have to write long combat scenes!
Quote
Ehh, it's not like they were doing anything useful anymore.
True, but I can't imagine Chey would be pleased with it if he knew. For the record, I imagine Moonshadow survived, and upon finding Flynn dead, ran away to her home-world to mourn. I didn't come up for an explanation for how she gets back to Cythera before it closes to the Void :
\