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Ares Chronicles: What Comes Before - Part XV: In Conclusion

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Posted 06 September 2000 - 01:43 PM

What Comes Before

Part XV: In Conclusion

As one of the most senior officers in the Obish navy, Admiral Princhep was given the honor of commanding Obish forces at Heshac to deal with a possible Audemedon threat.

Admiral Princhep accepted his assignment with a combination of excitement and some fear. The excellence of Audemedon technology is practically a matter of faith. A widely accepted truth that nonetheless, seems to be supported by no evidence. After all, other than some Salrilians, Cantharans, and the Audemedons themselves, no one has ever seen Audemendon forces in action.

As a result, Admiral Princhep only has intelligence on Audemedons that are composed of 1% of useless facts, 49% speculation, and 50% rumors.

There are rumors that a few years ago, an Elejeetian long-ranged probe was able to snap some valuable pictures of Audemedons ships conducting naval exercises. However, the Elejeetians have repeatedly denied that they ever sent a probe to Audemedon space.

There has also been rumors of some Ishiman military observers who were fortunate enough to witness Audemedon ground troops in action when the Audemedons sent their troops to aid the Cantharan order in eradicating the Zenaiyens. Rumors tell of giant metallic spiders over a mile high firing powerful pulse weapons that turn huge city blocks into massive craters. Smaller units moving at speeds of hundreds of miles per hour, shooting down civilians with incredible accuracy.

Of Audemedon tactics. Landing transports directly on buildings, leveling them while crushing hundreds of people at the same time. Of transports dropping troops from the sky. After suffering falls of several miles, the troops immediately climbed out of the craters of their own creation and proceeded to massacre the civilian population.

Obviously, trying to construct tactics from such poor sources of information is diffficult to say the least. Preparing for an enemy that they knew little is a hard task. Trying to prepare for all possibilities is easier said than done.

At first, Princhep thought that observing Audemedon ships in the Secorem System will give him a clue as to Audemedon naval tactics.

No such luck.

Inexplicably, the Audemedon fleet does not even maneuver. Every single one of their ships stand perfectly still at its position. Ever since the admiral's arrival a week ago, none of the Audemedon ships ever changed its position even slightly. No ship departed and no ship arrived. The initial fleet of 10 carriers, 20 gunships, and 40 cruisers remain unchanged.

***

As Princhep spends another day planning strategy with his staff, a message came over the intercomm:

"This is the bridge to Admiral Princhep. Please respond."

"This is Princhep. Go ahead."

"Sir, our long range probes indicate that the entire Audemedon fleet had just went into hyperspace."

The admiral and his staff looked at one another in stunned silence. Then he quickly replied:

"I'm on my way."

***

"Ssss," the doors to the bridge slid open and the admiral and his staff walked in excited paces onto the bridge.

"Status report."

"About half a minute ago, the entire Audemedon fleet suddenly jumped into hyperspace. Our probes and advanced scouts have determined that they are coming here."

"Here?"

"Yes, sir. We estimate ETA to be 2 days."

There was only one thing left to do.

"Send to all ships: Red alert. Prepare to engage the enemy."

***

Now the admiral sits on his chair, staring at his view screen at the slowly approaching Audemedon fleet. He knows he would receive no reinforcements.

For the admiral had just received messages from Obain informing him of the surprise Cantharan offensive. If he attempts to withdraw, he will be caught between Audemedon forces pursuing him and Cantharan forces blocking him.

The Audemedon ships continue their approach. The admiral wonders why they approach so slowly. Is that their top speed? Are they transfering power to some exotic weapons? Or are they merely trying to hide their true strength?

"No response, sir."

"Keep on hailing them."

"Aye, sir."

"Do you think they're in a mood to talk?" asked the commander.

"I hope so. I hope so."

Suddenly, the Audemedon cruisers accelerated. In a blink of an eye, they have crashed into Obish lines and began firing fiercely. The Audemedon carriers also began launching their fighters and their missiles. Their gunships abegan firing as well.

"How can their energy weapons have such a long range!" exclaimed the commander.

The admiral didn't have time to speculate.

"Order cruiser wings 1 and 2 to attack enemy carriers. Left flank will proceed to attack enemy capital ships. Cruiser wings 5 and 6 will protect them. Cruiser wings 3 and 4 will protect center. Cruiser wings 7 and 8 will protect right flank. Cruiser wings 9 and 10 will attack enemy gunships."

Just then, space is suddenly filled with Audemedon cruisers. Some firing, some flying. Most appearing out of seemingly nowhere. Obish ships were completely confused by the sudden appearance of so many ships. Some of them fired, but the weapons fire went through the target.

"What the hell's going on!"

"Sir, our cruisers are reporting great difficulty in evading enemy missiles!"

"Sir, enemy fighters appear to be heavily shielded. Our ships are having a hard times trying to destroy any of them."

"Give me list of the current status of all ships."

As the admiral's console was fed the requested data, the admiral watched in horror. Then he suddenly ordered:

"Tell all of our ships to stand down."

"What?"

"That is an order!"

The entire bridge crew stared at the admiral in disbelief. But the admiral's face was resolute.

"Aye, sir. Sending message."

"Sir, our ships are requesting verification."

"Re-send the message. All ships stand down immediately."

The message was sent.

"What's going on?" asked the commander.

That is when he glanced at the vice-admiral's console and saw what the admiral saw.

"Status of our ships?" asked the vice-admiral.

"All ships have answered the stand down order, sir."

"Status of enemy ships?"

"Sir, they've stopped firing. And they're halting their approach. Enemy cruisers have returned to their formation. Most of their cruisers have disappeared."

"Hail them again."

"Aye, sir."

"Sir, the enemy is not responding."

"What are they doing?" murmured Princhep.

That was when the Cantharan gate ship jumped into Heshac.

***

"This is Admiral Mek Het of the Cantharan Order. By now, you must have realized that you are being surrounded by superior forces. Resistance is hopeless. Your only viable option is to surrender."

"This is Admiral Princhep of the Obish fleet. I am willing to discuss terms."

"The terms are simple. Your ships will lower their shields and power down their weapons. Then, they will be boarded and taken over by our people. Your people will be placed under imprisonment. They will be treated in accordance to the Bazidan Convention regarding the prisoners of war."

"Those terms are acceptable. I hereby formally surrender my fleet to the Cantharan Order."

"Your surrender has been accepted. You can be assured, the rules governing the treatment of prisoners of war will be followed scrupulously."

***

In a few minutes, the bridge of the vice-admiral's flag ship has been vacated. The vice-admiral's console is still on, revealing the fact that in a minute of engaging the Audemedons, one-third of Obish ships have shield levels at single digits. Yet no Obish ship was destroyed...

***

Being forced to negotiate terms of surrender is perhaps the most humiliating thing that can ever happen to a representative of a people. It is a clear acknowledgement of one's inferiority when compared to one's adversary. There are those who are willing to die than surrender. Their pride refuse to live under a humiliating peace.

Senator Primothek is old enough to witness many humiliations. Witnessing the privations caused by the war on the Obish people that he so loves tortures him. Yet now he is being asked by the Obish National Senate to negotiate with Admiral Mek Het, Chief Strategist of the Cantharan Order, chief representative of the Order and the Gaitori Union, for a peace treaty.

It is not so much a negotiation as in being forced to accept dictated terms. The senators realized that. Perhaps that is why they selected Senator Primothek. He is the most senior member of the entire Senate. Perhaps his reputation for honesty and fairness, and even his advanced age will offer some cover when the firestorm erupts.

There can be no doubt that the senator hated his assignment. Yet he accepted it without complaints. He promised his colleagues and his beloved Obiards that he will bring back an unpleasant treaty that will, nevertheless, deserve the seal of the Obish National Senate.

It pains the senator that the Obish people he loves so dearly must now capitulate to its enemies. No doubt the terms will be harsh. After 7 years of war and millions of fatalities, the Obiards will most likely be unable to retain any territories they acquired. Perhaps they might even be forced to pay a huge indemnity to its enemies, maybe even accept blame for the war.

The senator becomes physically ill thinking about possible terms. For so long, he served his people. He loves his job not because he enjoys power but because he enjoys servicing his people. His people respect him. They re-elected him every time. Now he is being forced to negotiate his people's capitulation.

After 7 long years, Obain was shattered. Its economy crumbled due to trade embargos by every major power. Now the so-called "shadow economy" is even larger than the legal economy. War brought poverty, refugees, and additional graveyards to the Obish people.

The senator's decades of service within the senate seem completely meaningless when confronting the reality of the situation. Like so many of his fellow colleagues, the senator felt personally ashamed by what they can show for.

7 years ago, the Obish National Senate voted overwhelmingly for war. Soon, the senate must endorse dictated terms.

7 years ago, the government promised its people compensation from the Gaitori. Now, the government can barely pay the pensions for its own veterans.

7 years ago, his people marched off to war in great spirits, believing that justice was on their side. Now the Obish spirit was drained by the war. The people have become cynical. They no longer believe in justice.

The Obish people bore the tragedy of their situation with surprising calm. There were few demonstrations, few labor strikes. When the government announced that Obain has decided to surrender, the people bore it with no great disruptions. It was almost as if they knew that day was coming. They faced this tragedy with their industriousness and silence.

Perhaps it is the magnitude of their tragedy that forced them to realize that all is lost.

The Obish situation deteriorated within a week. They lost control of the entire Free Trade Zone. The capture of their base at Proteus was certainly a great shock. The surrender of so many Obish ships at Heshac is an even greater humiliation. Compounded with shock and humiliation is the fear following the nightmarish Battle of Fulchreon. The valiant charge of Cantharan and Gaitori ships is now engraved on the Obish psyche. The Obish spirit has been defeated.

The reality is now on the side of the enemy. The enemy now has the initiative in their hands. Half of the Obish navy was lost. Meanwhile, the Cantharans are still mobilizing troops. They haven't even dug into their reserves yet. Obain is surrounded by only hostile or, at best, unfriendly neighbors.

The Obish National Senate declared a week of mourning. They expect that their prisoners in the hands of the Cantharans, all 200,000 of them, will never return home.

It is under this pall of despair and fear that the senator faced the admiral.

Interestingly, not only are there no Gaitoris in the Admiral Mek Het's delegation but the Cantharans are all dressed in white, the Cantharan color for mourning.

"Senator," began the admiral. "First, allow me to express my condolences to your people. Please forward the grief felt by the Cantharan Supreme Council and the Cantharan people alike."

The senator was suddenly seized by the urge to wring the admiral's neck. How can he be so pretentious?

"We have never wished to go to war against the Obish people. We recognize your people as a proud and honorable race. We treasure our friendship. We value your honesty. We praise your bravery."

These usual words of diplomatic pleasantries now sound like insults to the senator.

"Unfortunately, circumstances forced us to this table. Circumstances forced us to sit at opposite sides of the table. It is the sincere wish of all Cantharans to end this devastating conflict as soon as possible. Both sides have suffered heavy losses. Our peoples have been denied peace and friendship by fate. Let us march forward together as friends once more."

The senator is doing a remarkable job suppressing his impatience. Sensing that impatience, the admiral decided to bring up the issues immediately.

"Now, as the chief negotiator for the Cantharan Order and the Gaitori Union, I would like to present our terms." He then handed a pad to the senator.

Seeing that the pad is filled with diplomatic language, and since the senator is not in the mood for such language, he immediately pressed for a summary:

1) Gaitori Union will exchange POWs with Obain.
2) Obain will return all captured Gaitori territory.
3) The Union and Obain will resume diplomatic relations.
4) The Order and Obain will resume diplomatic relations.
5) Obain will recognize Cantharan sovereignty over the now defunct Free Trade Zone.

The senator looked up in surprise. Where is the term demanding Obain to accept responsibility of the war? Where is the term demanding huge indemnities? Most importantly, what about the 200,000 Obish POWs in Cantharan hands?

Seeing the senator's expression after reviewing the summary, the admiral could guess the senator's questions.

"Senator," he began. "As I said, we valued your friendship. We still wanted to re-establish our friendship. That is why we tried to work out terms that will be the least damaging to your people. War is a terrible business and few can claim to be exempt from its ill effects. I know that your people suffered deeply. I would not wish to further burden them with excessive demands."

The senator stared at the admiral with disbelief. But he holds the terms in his hands. Can the admiral really be sincere?

"What about our prisoners in your hands?"

"Believe me, if the negotiations are up to me entirely, they would be returning to you by now. However, our Gaitori friends are deeply suspicious of you. They do not trust you to abide by the terms. That is why-"

"You are holding them as a precaution."

"I'm really sorry, senator. I tried to explain to our Gaitori friends that this precaution is unnecessary. That the Obiards, despite being their enemies, are an honorable people who will abide by their word. But the war took a toll on the Gaitori people. Although I dislike criticizing my allies, I must say that they have become somewhat paranoid. They insisted that we hold your people until the terms are fulfilled. But I can assure you in the names of my children, they are being well-treated. I guarantee you that they will be released after you have fulfilled your obligations."

The senator was slightly displeased by this complication. But even he must conclude that these are fairly generous terms considering the circumstances. Besides, it is only natural that the Gaitori, after having suffered so many casualties of their own, will want some assurance that the terms will be fulfilled.

Still, the senator is a cautious man. Therefore he asked:

"I must say I am surprised, admiral. No delegation of responsibility, no indemnities?"

The admiral smiled.

"As I said before, senator, many of us still wish that our relationship has not been irrevocably damaged. We still hope to repair them. As a result, we managed to prevail upon our Gaitori allies to lessen the terms. It was not easy. The Gaitori can be very stubborn. But in the end, they decided that our course of action is wise."

The admiral leaned forward and said in a voice of great sincerity:

"Senator, I know that your people must bear deep hatred toward my people. I can't say that I blame them. I can only wish that hatred will slowly be washed away when they see that our words are sincere. We have no animosity towards the Obish people. The Cantharan Order desires peace above all. We take no joy in burdening your people.

Many of us still wish that some day, Obiards and Cantharans will be able to sit at a table of brotherhood and share a drink of friendship. That some day, our offsprings will cease seeing one another as enemies. That some day, we will be fighting on the same sides, that an Obiard will not hesitate to shed his life to save a Cantharan and vice versa. That some day, this dark chapter in our histories will be viewed as an exceptional time that is not repeated. That some day, we will be able to hold one another's hands and be proud to have one another as friends. That the animosities of today will be washed away like rain washing away dust on a roof, to reveal its scintillating beauty."

***

The Obish National Senate overwhelmingly endorsed the terms of peace. When the ratification was announced, there was celebration on the streets. The torturous 7 years are finally over. That should be enough to brighten the spirits of both the living and the dead alike.

Obiards withdrew from Gaitori territory with dispatch, sometimes even failing to destroy left over equipment and structures. Everyone wishes to put the memory of war behind.

The exchange of POWs between the Union and Obain went smoothly, probably because the Cantharans monitored the process closely, forbidding the Gaitori from undertaking acts of retaliation.

Perhaps part of the reason why the Gaitori has become so compliant towards the Order is because the Gaitori economy is in ruins. If they receive indemnnities from Obain, they would've been able to rebuild their economy. As it stands, the Union now depends on the Order to supply generous loans and grants.

Some observant outsiders have noticed that Cantharan financial aid to the Union is usually enough to keep the people alive but never enough to begin any meaningful construction of the country's economy.

But the Obiards could not care less. All they wanted is for their people to come home. Therefore they withdrew quickly. They complied with the terms ahead of schedule.

The Cantharans rendered their services by sending their own transports to ship Obiards back to their homeland and Gaitori back to their lost territories now regained. Without their assistance, the Obiards would not be able to comply with the schedule much less ahead of the schedule. The Gaitori tried to sabotage Obish compliance. But each time, the Order managed to resolve the conflict before it became a conflagration.

Knowing that their POWs will return home ahead of schedule is certainly good news to the Obish people. In addition, the Order, to the dismay of the Union, announced that they will end their trade embargo against Obain.

The Obish National Senate declared that all 200,000 Obish POWs will be treated as heroes when they return. No one is in a mood to lay blame. All Obiards are busy trying to put the memories of the past 7 years behind them. No one can stomach long court-martials.

A parade was planned at the capital when they return. When Senator Primothek meets with Admiral Mek Het once again to certify that Obain had indeed complied with the terms, he had the solace of knowing that one of his grandsons who was captured by the Cantharans, will be returning home. In addition, the senator had also decided to retire.

***

"...Finally, the last of our troops in Gaitori territory withdrew 10 hours ago." concluded Senator Primothek.

The admiral examined a confirmation replort from his subordinates.

"That's true," he said.

"I hereby request that you, as the head delegate representing the Cantharan Order and the Gaitori Union, certify that Obain had indeed complied with all of its obligations and request that the Cantharan Order comply with its obligation in freeing our POWs."

"Agreed," said the admiral. Then he stood up. The Cantharan delegation also followed. The Obish delegation, including the senator stood up as well.

"Senator, please give my compliments to your people and your government. You have fulfilled your obligations most admirably under difficult circumstances."

The senator nodded and asked:

"When can we expect the return of our people?"

The admiral looked at the time and smiled.

"Actually, I think we can see the recording now."

"What 'recording?'"

"Senator, the Order never doubted that Obain will comply with the terms. That is why several hours ago, I have already ordered the release of your people. In addition, I hope it will please your people to know that I have prevailed upon my government to allow your people to return in their own ships."

The senator was surprised. He suddenly felt something wet on his face. It was his tears.

His people will not only return home but return in full military honors! They will not be bound like prisoners and handed over to the Obiards at the border. They will return in their own ships! Piloted by themselves! And under their own power!

The admiral smiled.

"As I said, the Order has no intention of humiliating your people. We know that you are a proud and courageous people. We certainly will not embarass your people by chaining them like animals. But let us not waste words. Computer, is there a data stream for me coming from Cantharis?"

"Affirmative. Data stream encoded for restricted access."

"Computer, decrypt data stream. Authorization 1-73-409-2888."

"Authorization confirmed."

The admiral turned to the senator and said:

"I asked my people to prepare this data stream so that you can bring the recording back to Obain first to reasure your people. It will also serve as proof that they have returned in full military honors."

The senator whispered:

"Thank you."

"Computer, serve data stream."

True enough, a blank screen on the wall started to relay an image. Ships, lots of them. Obish ships. All of them traveling in formation leaving a dock yard.

And not even under guard by Cantharan warships!

If there is one last proof that the Cantharans intended for the Obish POWs to return in full military honors, then that proof had just been provided by the Cantharans.

Then the ships were destroyed.

All of them. Every single one of them exploded. In a split second, the screen was filled with explosions large and small, near and far. The larger ones covered the smaller ones and the nearer ones were brighter than the farther ones. But all of them exploded. At the same time. As if someone pushed a button to destroy all the ships.

The senator felt as if he was about to faint.

"Like I promised, your people have been returned to you in full military honors. They died at their posts."

Someone added:

"I hope Obish souls know how to activate the jump gate." Those words brought uproarious laughter from the Cantharan delegation.

The last thing the senator heard was the admiral's voice:

"I just want to let you know that we killed them because we can."

***

Admiral Kinthi walked out of the Assembly doors with somewhat of a light heart. At least he will never have to deal with his responsibilities again.

"I take full responsibility of the Obish-Gaitori debacle and offer my resignation. I have failed to serve my people well and I can only wish that my successor will have more luck than I did."

The admiral seemed to attribute his failure to bad luck. But everyone in the assembly knew that the Salrilians were the ones who dealt that bad luck.

"For forty-three years of my life, I attempted to serve my people to the best of my abilities. Recently, I have become aware that that is simply not good enough."

Now that the Gaitori has become a Cantharan client and the Cantharans are in control of the free Trade Zone. The Ishimans were utterly humiliated by their recent adventure that they are withdrawing into isolation. So did the Elejeetians, partly prompted by Ishiman isolation. So followed the Obiards, partly prompted by the isolation of the former two. The coalition that the admiral dreamed of collapsed before it was formed.

"For whatever credibility I have left, I must speak to my countrymen on a subject of critical importance, the subject of faith."

The admiral is treading on thin ice. He has no credibility whatsoever left in the hearts of the Ishiman people. The disaster has been attributed to him. Now he cannot show his face in public without somone spitting on it.

"I must counsel my people to remain strong."

It is unlikely that the Ishiman People's Assembly will take his counsel, much less the Ishiman people. Moreover, the morale of the people is low after the recent foreign policy debacle.

"We must be vigilant in defying the aggression of others."

The admiral is speaking for himself. Several Ishiman assemblymen already called for a conference with the Cantharans to resolve their differences. Even some under the admiral's own command suggested that peaceful coexistence with the Cantharans is possible.

"I must warn my people: This latest Cantharan advance is only one in a long chain that will not end until they have conquered everyone else. My people must remain determined in resisting their demands. If our latest experience had taught us anything, that is Cantharan offers of peace cannot be trusted."

There are those in the assembly who vigorously disagree with the admiral, particularly on his last point.

"I cannot escape my responsibility, therefore I offer my resignation. However, I must warn my people against escaping their responsibility by offering their resignation. The Cantharans must not be allowed to expand. Our silence gives them consent. If we only think of ourselves, there will come a time when we will find ourselves friendless and at the mercy of the Cantharans."

Then again, as some assemblymen pointed out: If we think of others, then who is going to think of us?

He looked around the assembly. So many assemblymen's faces are drenched in tears.

According to Ishiman law, the assembly must consider any proposal signed by 1% of the population. The petition to dismiss the admiral exceeded that limit. The assembly was ready to dismiss him when Assemblyman Riaurtei made an impassioned plea on behalf of the admiral. He cited the fact that ultimately, the assembly was the one that endorsed the idea of intervention. Therefore if responsibility is to be doled out, then the assembly is also guilty of incompetence. The assembly narrowly defeated the motion.

Assemblyman Riaurtei may have saved the admiral's career. But no one could've saved his reputation, now in ruins. The admiral realized that it is better for him to resign before he is dismissed.

Another reason why the admiral is willing to resign is one that he cannot admit to anyone because he has trouble admitting it to himself. Serving the Ishiman people has become distasteful to him. He watched his people descend step by step into chaos and disorder due to protracted confrontations in the international arena. Who can blame them for desiring a rest from the confusion of international politics?

Yet the admiral knows that blocking one's ears does not solve problems. Therefore he tries to counsel his people one last time, even when he knows that few, if any, will listen. They are tired of his advice. They ridicule his advices for their impracticality.

"I once thought that the Salrilians always managed to stay a step ahead of us. Now I am forced to concede that I was wrong: They stayed 3 steps ahead.

Our ancestors have made it the Ishiman mission to preserve diversity in the galaxy."

As the Salrilians might suggest, it is about time that the Ishimans get a new mission, perhaps one that will be more compatible with Salrilian goals?

"The key to defeating the Salrilians lies in our historic mission. The Salrilians abhor diversity because diversity includes random elements that they can neither predict nor control. Therefore they seek to eliminate such diversity. It is in our best interest to preserve ourselves by preserving diversity."

Then again, some have suggested that continued confrontation with the Salrilians have led to one defeat after another. Perhaps it is time for a change in strategy?

***

The admiral saw 2 of his assistants waiting for him. As he walked closer, he saw one of them in tears and the other one's head buried in his knees.

As that first assistant saw him approaching, he tried to be calm, without success. Hearing his footsteps, that second assistant raised his head and saw the admiral. The assistant's face was wet and his eyes swollen.

"Admiral, we believed in you, and we still do."

The admiral let off an ironic smile.

"That's good. Because I can no longer believe in myself."

FINIS

-htjyang:not the imposter

#2 User is offline   Sargatanus 

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Posted 25 September 2000 - 05:34 PM

I think I'm going to cry now... Well, not really.

Well, it's time for my half-assed review: The plot was one of the best and most complex I've seen in some time. It's flow was almost completely linear, and always kept my interest. Your ability to write dialouge in also quite impressive.

There was however, a serious lacking in both visualization and character development (though the latter may be due in part to the fact that very few characters lasted more than two chapters). The lack of visuals is my biggest complaint. I'm a stickler for scenery, and it wouldn't hurt to add a room and/or character description.

You've got the plot, now paint us the picture.

4 6 3 8 A B K 2 4 A L G M O R 3 Y X 24 89 R P S T O V A L

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Posted 25 September 2000 - 07:49 PM

When the Athenian fleet was captured by the Spartan fleet at Aegospotami in 405 B.C.E., the Greek historian Xenophon wrote that "a sound of wailing arose" in Athens. Sparta had won the Peloponnesian War. No doubt, a similar wailing occured at Obain when the Obiards heard of the surrender of their fleet at Heshac.

After writing 15 parts of a story, I hope all of you will forgive me for posting the following random babble:

Concluding Thoughts

I AM THE FIRST PERSON TO READ THE CONCLUSION! I AM THE FIRST PERSON TO READ THE CONCLUSION! HA! HA! HA! I AM THE FIRST PERSON TO READ THE CONCLUSION! I AM-

(Sorry for that interruption. The evil angels in htjyang had temporarily seized control. We, the better angels, have defeated them. Order had been restored. Peace had been restored. Humility had been restored. Natural harmony had been restored. In short, everything desirable had been restored. All except gloating...) Posted Image

The journey from Part I to FINIS was certainly a long and strange one. I originally planned 10 parts. Look how it bloated out of all proportions. (This does not bode well for my upcoming EV series. If a 50% bloat rate holds, then my planned 15-part EV story will evolve into 22-3 parts. I'm not sure if I can keep my sanity intact.)

In writing this story, I sought to accomplish a few things:
a) Give me something to do when I suffer from insomnia,
:P Entertain myself and perhaps a few others,
c) Attempt to provide a few answers about events prior to Ares by presenting my own interpretations.
d) Resolve the Salrilian precognition problem presented by Ares, (Despite Nathan Lamont's claim that they possess precognitive capabilities, it was certainly not shown through the game. I seek to remedy that by showing it through this story.)

Perhaps some of you noticed that none of the Salrilians were given names. This of course, was done intentionally, preserving the Salrilian mystery.

The greatest difficulty I encountered in writing this story is trying to describe 3-D action with 2-D words. They are better shown through a movie than reading them from a web page. I still don't believe I pulled it off successfully. It's probably why I included very few actual battle scenes. Most of it is conferred through dialogue, leaving readers to imagine the scenes themselves.

Writing a tragedy is difficult. Writing a tragedy that ended with a senseless massacre and the elimination of hope is doubly so. Even I was appalled and depressed by the ending. (Not to mention having to confront the question of who created this tragedy. The Cantharans or me?)

People usually hate it when the bad guys win. In this story, the Cantharans not only won, but won so completely as to be positively revolting to the stomach.

Addendum: Consistency

If you look back at my story, perhaps you might be surprised at how consistent it is with the established facts in Ares. All I did was add missing details. Consider:

1) In a total of 20 missions, the Obiards assisted in 3 of them. In level 4, they assisted because their people was kidnapped. One can argue that they assisted in level 2 because of past hatred left over from their war with the Gaitori. But what of level 10? The only time they fought against Cantharans? Part XV explains this well.

2) Admiral Kinthi's speech in Part VII provides a possible explanation of why the Salrilians were unable to anticipate the Ishiman offensive in Ares.

3) The story not only provides a reason why the Obiards have stealth technology but may also suggest a reason why the Gaitori gunship's secondary weapon is the only other secondary weapon that has both auto-targeting and guidance capabilities. (The other is the secondary weapon equipped on Salrilian carriers and the Cantharan gate ship.)

Finally, I hope to thank those of you who are actually patient enough to read this whole thing. Your patience is incredible (What do you people do at your spare time? Watch the paint dry? Posted Image ) and I salute you.

I also wish to apologize to those of you who did submit chronicles during this long series. Hopefully, they'll be posted soon.

P.S. Since I am writing another series for EV, I would like anyone who read the entire series to submit any suggestions for improvements. An example is Sargatanus's critique of Part II. Please don't just tell me: "Part X SUCKS BIG TIME!!!" Instead, tell me, using an objective view, why a certain part is not good. Please refrain from expletives. I'm emotionally vulnerable. I have high blood pressure. Please don't hurt me! (insert blood-curdling scream) Posted Image

I'll start the public lynching by throwing the first stone:

1) Better editing on my part regarding spelling errors, typos, and grammatical mistakes.

The 2nd stone:

2) Better characterization

I've just come to realize that although the closest thing to a main character in my story is obviously Mek Het, the real main character (in the old fashioned literary sense) is Kinthi. He's the only character who exhibited change. Mek Het basically stayed in his character.

Then again, this story was never meant to be character-centric. It was meant to be plot-driven. Therefore character-wise, it suffered. My planned EV story will be more character-centric.

Anyone else care to join in?

[The above comments were completed on 9/18/2000.]

To Sargatanus: Your comments are very well taken. Your critique about the lack of visualization has been partially addressed above. I'll see what I can do to fill in some scenery in my upcoming Ares story and my postponed EV story.

Your critique about the lack of character development was already anticipated in the concluding thoughts and in my comments to Part XIV. Unfortunately, as you also recognized, it is fairly difficult to develop characters when the ones that have the potential to change usually don't last long. I'm afraid my upcoming Ares story may continue this trend (Although this time, the main character will have the opportunity to change and will change.)

That is why I noted in my comments in Part XIV that I postponed my EV story with some reluctance. In that story, the main characters will be much more constant and will appear in most parts and will receive much longer coverage (so to speak).

Thank you very much for giving my a critique before I even asked for it. (Now let's hope others will take a minute or two and do the same.)

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The only officially constituted, patented, and authorized htjyang. All rights not explicitly granted are withheld. Void where prohibited.

[This message has been edited by htjyang (edited 09-25-2000).]
"[T]o those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists for they erode our national unity and diminish our resolve. They give ammunition to America's enemies and pause to America's friends. They encourage people of good will to remain silent in the face of evil."

- Attorney General John Ashcroft, 12/7/2001, Senate Judiciary Committee

#4 User is offline   Sargatanus 

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Posted 25 September 2000 - 08:48 PM

...You also overlooked the bit about the Cantharan Crusades "having more to do with hunting down and harnessing the Boodan Virus than they do 'enlightening' primative civilizations."
4 6 3 8 A B K 2 4 A L G M O R 3 Y X 24 89 R P S T O V A L

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#5 User is offline   htjyang 

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Posted 26 September 2000 - 01:10 AM

I maintain that it was the Ishiman perspective, not necessarily a fact presented by the author.

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The only officially constituted, patented, and authorized htjyang. All rights not explicitly granted are withheld. Void where prohibited.
"[T]o those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists for they erode our national unity and diminish our resolve. They give ammunition to America's enemies and pause to America's friends. They encourage people of good will to remain silent in the face of evil."

- Attorney General John Ashcroft, 12/7/2001, Senate Judiciary Committee

#6 User is offline   Zell 

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Posted 26 September 2000 - 12:00 PM

Encore! Encore!

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Shoot!There goes my...
(BANG)
Oops!I didnt do it, nobody saw me do it, You can prove anythin...
(BANG)

#7 User is offline   Captain Calculas 

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Posted 29 September 2000 - 09:57 PM

Well, it's a pity the story has ended, I must say. And I hope that you plan to write another one chronicle like What Comes After. I especially want to be able to visualise the expression on Mek Het's face when he get's blown up Posted Image.

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#8 User is offline   htjyang 

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Posted 30 September 2000 - 01:36 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Captain Calculas:
Well, it's a pity the story has ended, I must say.  And I hope that you plan to write another one chronicle like What Comes After.  I especially want to be able to visualise the expression on Mek Het's face when he get's blown up  Posted Image.



I'm afraid I'll have to leave that to your vivid imagination or someone else's capable hands.

And just in case anyone has any funny ideas about what my next chronicle will be titled, it will not be called "What Comes After." (I admit, I'm not the most creative person when it comes to selecting titles, just look at the title for the final part. But you do have to give me some credit...)

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"Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam"
"[T]o those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists for they erode our national unity and diminish our resolve. They give ammunition to America's enemies and pause to America's friends. They encourage people of good will to remain silent in the face of evil."

- Attorney General John Ashcroft, 12/7/2001, Senate Judiciary Committee

#9 User is offline   htjyang 

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Posted 30 September 2000 - 01:40 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Zell:
Encore! Encore!



What do you think this is? A Britney Spears concert? Posted Image

"Encore" is usually used to call for a repetition of what came before (couldn't resist). If you want to read what came before, I think they'll be staying on Ambrosia's servers for some time.

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"Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam"
"[T]o those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists for they erode our national unity and diminish our resolve. They give ammunition to America's enemies and pause to America's friends. They encourage people of good will to remain silent in the face of evil."

- Attorney General John Ashcroft, 12/7/2001, Senate Judiciary Committee

#10 User is offline   Slug 

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Posted 07 October 2000 - 01:01 AM

Nice, man, real nice.

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#11 User is offline   Avatara 

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Posted 07 October 2000 - 09:36 PM

Quote

Originally posted by htjyang:
"Encore" is usually used to call for a repetition of what came before (couldn't resist).  If you want to read what came before, I think they'll be staying on Ambrosia's servers for some time.


Heh.

Quote

Originally posted by htjyang:
What do you think this is?  A Britney Spears concert?  Posted Image


I hope not. I never liked her anyway...

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*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
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#12 User is offline   htjyang 

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Posted 09 October 2000 - 04:22 AM

The more I think about WCB, the more I realize how limited it really is. It breaks few grounds and when it does, they're truly small steps. Consider: I introduced no major new races. The new races I mentioned all disappeared into insignificance in the same part. I introduced no new technologies. I simply re-worked the ones already introduced in Ares.

When one hears the title of "What Comes before," one already has a good idea of what the story is all about. Let's face it: How many people actually doubted the outcome of the Cantharan invasion of Earth? When you take all of these facts into account, then you truly realize how limited the story actually is.

[Apology to anyone who might be interested in my upcoming story: Unfortunately, reality caught up with my life and it isn't giving me any breaks. As a result, progress on my next story had slowed to a crawl. I will probably not be able to meet my own deadline of one to two months. On the bright side, I just thought up of a very interesting killer cliffhanger that I will insert somewhere at the end of chapter 2-4. Anyone who reads that cliffhanger will hate the moderators for not posting the next chapter. Posted Image ]

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"Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam"
"[T]o those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists for they erode our national unity and diminish our resolve. They give ammunition to America's enemies and pause to America's friends. They encourage people of good will to remain silent in the face of evil."

- Attorney General John Ashcroft, 12/7/2001, Senate Judiciary Committee

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