A Humor Joke

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A Humor Joke

#26 vecoriwen

Is an Outlier in the Histogram of Life.

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Posted 10 August 2004 - 05:45 PM

Dang. Thats a flippin' long sig.

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Michael Jackson's son, Prince Michael II will write a memoir in which he wistfully recalls that one glorious moment on the balcony when he nearly escaped.

Can you imagine if I was deranged?

#27 The Journalist

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Posted 10 August 2004 - 06:08 PM

I'm expected to read that?

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#28 glahti

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Posted 10 August 2004 - 06:58 PM

No, I just needed to remember that for something, and here was a Convenient place to stick it. Good book btw.

-glahti

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Then no matter where you are, in a crowded restaurant or on some desolate street or even in the comforts of your own home, you'll watch yourself dismantle every assurance you ever lived by. You'll stand aside as a great complexity intrudes, tearing apart, piece by piece, all of your carefully conceived denials, whether deliberate or unconscious. And then for better or worse, you'll turn, unable to resist, though try to resist you still will, fighting with everything you've got not to face the thing you most dread, what is now, what will be, what has always come before, the creature you truly are, the creature we all are, buried in the nameless black of a name.
And then the nightmares will begin.
-Johnny Truant (House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski)

You know what I like? Escalators. They need to make more products like escalators. See, they can't break. They can merely become stairs. So you walk into the store and see: "Escalator temporarily stairs, sorry for the convince".

#29 moonunit4eva

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Posted 10 August 2004 - 11:49 PM

So..a man walks into a bar...and says..Ouch.

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The guy with the dragon tatoo. His grandkids are going to ask what killed Puff.

Whatever happens..happens.

#30 LifeKnight

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Posted 11 August 2004 - 11:59 AM

Three cats walk under a bar. You tell me either if that's impossible or nothing happens. Posted Image

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#31 The Journalist

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Posted 11 August 2004 - 12:08 PM

So a five-dollar bill walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Get out! We don't serve your type here; this is a singles bar!"

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#32 Hell Toupee

tomorrow

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Posted 11 August 2004 - 11:08 PM

So, there are two muffins in and oven and one says, "hey, it's getting hot in here!" The other ones like, "Woah! It's a talking muffin!!!"

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Peace
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#33 The Journalist

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Posted 11 August 2004 - 11:51 PM

So this termite walks into a bar and says "Is the bartender here?"

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#34 Pufer

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Posted 13 August 2004 - 12:05 AM

A Rabbi, three Priests, a half dozen Buddhist monks, twenty three flamingos, and two hundred thousand and sixteen Hare Krishnas walk into a bar and are surprised at the spacious accomodations contained within.

-Pufer

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“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” -The Buddha

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#35 The Journalist

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Posted 13 August 2004 - 12:10 AM

A priest, a rabbi, a lawyer, a blonde, a redneck, and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "Is this some kind of joke?"

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#36 lobf

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Posted 14 August 2004 - 05:15 PM

A Jpurnalist walks into a bar, and a bunch of black banners CUT THEIR 8" HAIR AFTER AN ENTIRE YEAR!

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Entellagintly Desined

#37 The Journalist

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Posted 14 August 2004 - 08:57 PM

Ah, my good friend the Jpurnalist!

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#38 Pufer

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Posted 14 August 2004 - 11:40 PM

Quote

Originally posted by The Journalist:
Ah, my good friend the Jpurnalist!

Darn, I thought SA erased your memory of that guy. The memory-squid just isn't as effective as he used to be.

-Pufer

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“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” -The Buddha

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#39 The Journalist

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Posted 14 August 2004 - 11:47 PM

You people freak me out. First LOBF says something, I respond, and Pufer decides to talk about squid. That erases mem.....what was I talking about?

:skull hits keyboard:

Oh deeeeeear.

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#40 Sundered Angel

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Posted 14 August 2004 - 11:56 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Pufer:
Darn, I thought SA erased your memory of that guy. The memory-squid just isn't as effective as he used to be.

-Pufer

Don't worry, I have a fresh one on order. I'm just waiting for that damn Fedex guy.

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Sundered Angel,
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Sundered Angel,
The One and Only

Ares Webboard Moderator, and all-around Nice Guy

#41 The Journalist

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Posted 14 August 2004 - 11:58 PM

Okay, so is this guy my clone, my evil twin (my good twin?), or some guy spawned randomly from a typographical error?

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#42 Avatara

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Posted 15 August 2004 - 12:50 AM

Its your incestuous brother.

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*Unless it's Avatara, of course."
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#43 GandalfDaddy

And another one bites the dust. Another one down...

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Posted 15 August 2004 - 11:04 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Sundered Angel:
Don't worry, I have a fresh one on order. I'm just waiting for that damn Fedex guy.

They are rather slow aren't they, it only took 2 days for my screen to arrive.

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It seems people have a taste for hell in the morning.

'It seems people have a taste for hell in the morning. ';
The sig revolution died! Now it's time to move onto the self promotion revolution.

#44 The Journalist

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Posted 15 August 2004 - 05:53 PM

But...but....I don't have a brother!

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#45 Azeroth

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Posted 15 August 2004 - 05:58 PM

Quote

Originally posted by The Journalist:
But...but....I don't have a brother!

At least, not that you know of. Your parents smuggled him away at birth and gave him over to an ocelot to be raised.

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"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>

Tempting a sleeping giant with a pin isn't the same as hurling a whale at an irritated giant. -Avatara
"Hey, I'm not the one who wanted Gay Sex to become a moderator." -Avatara
"I find that unaccountably disturbing."-Sundered Angel
</sig>

#46 The Journalist

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Posted 15 August 2004 - 06:11 PM

Alright, so let's get this straight:

I have a brother, name The Jpournalist, who was raised by jungle cats.

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#47 Pufer

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Posted 15 August 2004 - 11:28 PM

Quote

Originally posted by The Journalist:
I have a brother, name The Jpournalist, who was raised by jungle cats.

Yup, and his diet consists entirely of frisbees and seaweed.

-Pufer

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“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” -The Buddha

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." -The Buddha

#48 The Journalist

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Posted 16 August 2004 - 04:25 PM

I would pay money to see someone eat a frisbee...

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#49 Rickton

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Posted 16 August 2004 - 05:21 PM

Quote

Originally posted by The Journalist:
I would pay money to see someone eat a frisbee...

I wouldn't, but that's just me.

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#50 The Journalist

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Posted 16 August 2004 - 05:31 PM

A friend of mine and i played frisbee half of last night.

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