Ambrosia Software Web Board: ATT Christmas Party! - Ambrosia Software Web Board

That was one of my favourites. I had to try it three or four times, just to make sure...

Hm I would have figured you'd be more attracted to the Santa vibrator.

I feel so dirty right now.

No, wait. That's just herpes.

Nice member title, GSN. Some incredibly cool person must have come up with that.

EDIT: Duh, typo.

This post has been edited by Shlimazel: 17 December 2008 - 08:30 PM

Pufer, I do believe that you are corrupting the youth.

Sundered Angel, on Dec 17 2008, 07:11 PM, said:

It's more of a purification ritual, really.

Sundered Angel, on Dec 17 2008, 06:11 PM, said:

Someone has to.

-Pufer

Pufer, on Dec 18 2008, 02:40 AM, said:

That's what Socrates said.

This doesn't sound much like a Christmas party anymore...

Sponge Tom, on Dec 18 2008, 03:21 AM, said:

You need to come to one of my Christmas parties, then. Accusing people of making the mistakes of foundational figures in philosophy is only the beginning...

Sponge Tom, on Dec 17 2008, 08:21 PM, said:

Rubbish. Come in, sit by the fire and warm yourself. The master of the house has provided spiked eggnog; our man Lek is mulling the port, soon to be given its robes and steamed; and I've brought along some comely young ladies, minus chaperones, and have hung mistletoe about the place, my good young sir.

Hors d'oeuvres are being served in the parlor in front of the tree, there's music in the sitting room, and later we're to have games! Do my eyes deceive me, or is it beginning to snow?

Viewing SA forcing me to drink hemlock in the dining room is strictly optional.

-Pufer

This post has been edited by Pufer: 17 December 2008 - 11:37 PM

Can I skip the brandy, milk, heavy cream, powdered sugar, and nutmeg and just consume raw egg yolks instead?

SA insists that we use nothing but pasteurized-in-shell eggs around here, so that should be perfectly alright. Of course, in doing so, you'll only be validating his paternalistic totalitarianism in trying to keep us from getting salmonella poisoning. If we want salmonella, we should be able to get it, by God!

-Pufer

I don't particularly mind his paternalistic totalitarianism. At least it keeps him off the streets.

Sundered Angel, on Dec 17 2008, 11:14 PM, said:

Thanks, but I think I'll stick with going to my grandparents' house...

Pufer, on Dec 17 2008, 11:35 PM, said:

Yeah...I think I'll pass. I'll be somewhere else. Tell me what I missed.

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the flat
The techno was blaring, 'twas too loud to chat
The rizlas were perched on the table with care
And smoke full of chemicals soon filled the air

We'd just been out clubbing, I truly was trashed
My friends were all here and equally mashed
We'd popped a few pills and we'd had a quick sniff
And just settled down to a nice tasty spliff

When out on the balcony rose such a clatter
We looked slowly up to see what was the matter
I got to my feet and I swayed to the door
And only occasionally fell on the floor

I peered through the glass as I took a long puff
The land glistened softly with rubbish and stuff
When what to my wandering eyes should appear
But a fat man in red and a team of reindeer

He yelled and he ranted, gave each one a kick
I knew in a second it must be Saint Nick
He shrieked at each Reindeer and cursed them alike
"F*ck you!" yelled Rudolph "we're going on strike!"

The reindeer did turn and soar into the sky
And Santa growled something that wasn't goodbye
I watched as they went in a puff of pink smoke
And vowed from now on to stay off of the coke

As debris did settle St Nick turned around
He swore as he angrily kicked at the ground
He gave me a gesture that clearly implied
He'd be very pleased if I let him inside

I threw the doors open and ushered him in
Invited him through with a welcoming grin
"So where are our presents?" my smashed flatmate cried
With a look of astonishment, Santa replied;

"You seriously think you might be on my list?
You've got to be kidding, you're taking the piss!
Have you lot considered your actions this year?
Stop being stupid and get me a beer."

He opened a carling, but still looked depressed
We asked him to tell us what made him so stressed
"My reindeer have left me" he said with a sigh
"Unless I have reindeer I've no way to fly!"

"Now look here" I told him "we may not know much
We don't help old ladies, kiss babies and such,
But Santa, there's no need for you to despair
We know how to get you back up in the air!"

I chopped up a line with precision and skill
And rolled him up neatly a £20 bill
His face lit up quickly with real Christmas cheer
"Perhaps you kids WILL get some presents this year!"

He spoke not a word but got straight to his mission
He snorted that line with wholehearted ambition
Then Santa skinned up and he smiled as he puffed
We knew that our stockings this year would be stuffed

He sprang to the balcony, leapt from the railing
Soared to the sky with his present-sack trailing
I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Hahaha, please tell me you wrote that.

Rickton, on Dec 19 2008, 04:37 PM, said:

Happy to report I did not. Awesome nonetheless

So what is the primary dish for everyone's Xmas dinner?

-Pufer

Meeeeeaatloooooaffff......

Das ist der wonderbar....

Fried Carp and Potato Salad, the traditional Czech Christmas dinner, on the 24th.
Roast Turkey with all the trimmings, the traditional English Christmas dinner, on the 25th.

Me and my girlfriend are dedicating Christmas Eve and Christmas Day to ourselves and nobody else.

We're having Beef wellington, roast potatoes, broccoli and asparagus for dinner on Christmas eve, followed by sticky toffee pudding and custard, washed down with some champagne.

Christmas day I'm making pancakes for breakfast (we both come from large families with young kids, so always get up early at christmas. This year we're not getting up till at least 10am), with lemon and sugar or syrup washed down with bucks fizz. Then we've bought lots of christmas party food, pigs in blankets, mini yorkshire puddings with beef, mini pizzas and mini quiches, so we're planning on lounging around all day, snuggling on the sofa, eating those when we feel like it, drinking bucks fizz, watching DVDs and playing with our presents.

After that we're having 2 or maybe 3 full on Christmas turkey dinners with various members of our families, so we're going to be making the most of the calm before the storm.

And I can't wait!

I was hoping for some photoshopped pictures.

Shlimazel, on Dec 20 2008, 10:54 AM, said:

Meatloaf is terrible. You are terrible.

What's the difference between a bucks fizz and a mimosa?

-Pufer