Ambrosia Software Web Board: Best. Telemarketer. EVER - Ambrosia Software Web Board

*phone rings*
Me: hello?
Guy: Hello, is Clifford Morton (my brother) avaliable?
Me: Uh...no, im his brother and he no longer lives here.
Guy: Oh...well...this is just a telemarketer (laughs)
Me: Oh okay (laughing)
Guy: Well, sorry for wasting one second of your time
Me: Dont worry about it man. Seeya.
*click*

Brilliant.

*3T

This post has been edited by 3vil L337: 14 February 2005 - 04:10 PM

Hah, now I know your brother's name.

Drat.

*3T

Wow, I wish more telemarketers were like that.

Why aren't you on the do not call list?

Maybe he likes being called by random strangers who sometimes turn out to be cool like this guy was?

My dad sings to telemarketers...if they ask him a question, he sings his answer...Everyone gets on the phone and listens to the telemarketer try to stay on topic without cracking up.

So he's not on the do not call list either?

My mom hates telemarketers with a passion. Some are still stupid enough to call us, because some lady named Julie gives out our phone number as her own...grr...

We like to mess with them. We don't get too many calls either.

We have caller ID, so whenever a telemarketer shows up (Unavailable), we'l either ignore it, or I'll have some fun.

I have a friend who made a telemarketer cry.

Rickton, on Feb 14 2005, 08:03 PM, said:

That quote just got some free advertising. Awesome.

I'm on the do-not-call list and nonetheless get charity/political calls on a regular basis, more frequently since the past year with all its election fundraising.

My wife has also gotten a recorded message on her phone, "Hi, this is <name>. It is important that you call me at <800 number>." I suspect this is an opt-in ploy; if you return the call, doing so implies consent to receive calls from this agency/person.

On the other hand, I've gotten telemarketers to scream (before the do-not-call list). My wife retains the use of her maiden name; for the sake of discussion, we'll say it's MacGregor.

Telemarketer calls, assumes air of casual friendliness, asks to speak to her.

"May I ask who's calling?"
"Is this Mr. MacGregor?"
"No. May I ask who's calling?"
"This is Jim from <company.>"
"And what is this call in regards to, Jim?"
"Is this Mr. MacGregor?"
"No."
"Then I can't tell you." (Note the high security in use here. If I *had* said I was Mr. MacGregor, would Jim spill his guts?)
"Well, Jim, unless you tell me what this call is about, you can't speak to her."
"It's a private matter."
"Sorry, Jim, you'll have to tell me what this call is in regards to."
"Are you Mr. MacGregor?"
"No."
"Then I can't tell you."
"Well, Jim, unless you want to stop being evasive, I can't help you."
"I'M BEING EVASIVE?!?!?!"
<telemarketer hangs up>

For whatever perverse reasons - perhaps they're assigned x numbers in a given area, Jim the Telemarketer calls back the next night, at about the same time. I answer the phone (which I routinely do after 9PM).

"May I ask who's calling?" I say, even though I recognize the guy's voice.
"This is Jim with <company>," comes the reply. Clearly, he's taken his Zoloft.
"And what is this call in regards to?"
"Are you Mr. MacGregor?"
"No. We've been through this already, Jim. Good bye."
<I hang up>

Yet another person called the next night. I guess Jim needed a night off. They didn't get past the screening, either.

The calls stopped. Guess it wasn't as important as they said it was.

Very nice.

moonunit4eva, on Feb 14 2005, 07:41 PM, said:

BRILLIANT!

*3T

My dad is a brilliant man. I've pretended to be Chinese before..it was great.

Oddest call I ever took - don't know if it was a telemarketer or not.

<them>"Is this Mrs. Shrout"
<me>"No, I'm sorry, may I ask who's calling"
<them>"Where's Mrs. Shrout, I need to speak to Mrs. Shrout"
<me>"I'm sorry, I'd just like to know who's calling"
<them>"Where's Mrs. Shrout - Give me Mrs. Shrout - I Have to talk to"
<Me> "I'm sorry - who is this?"
<Them>"F*** YOU! Give me Mrs. Shrout!"
<Me>"Um, I'm Sorry." click

Odd, they never called back...

Something tells me it wasn't a telemarketer.

Or a very grumpy one.

:double post:

This post has been edited by The Journalist: 14 February 2005 - 10:58 PM

I seriously doubt it.

Me too, but still, grumpy people do odd things.

I once pretended that I was my own brother with an US Army Recruiter who called trying to sign me up. I have no brother and the recruiter, who was looking at my file at the time, knew this (I said my name was Thomas, which, if I remember correctly, means "twin"). We went back and forth with the charade for a good fifteen minutes before he finally gave up and disconnected. Really a rather pitiful situation, but I wasn't about to admit to myself being who I actually am after the initial lie.

My father's friend Cel, on the other hand, talks to the telemarketers. He doesn't talk about anything in particular, just whatever is on his mind. He says that the telemarketers will usually go along with him for about five minutes before they ask, "Do you really have any intention of signing up with CrapCo telephone service?" At which point he answers, "Nope." and hangs up the phone. Not too bad a way to do it.

-Pufer

Hmmmm. This topic reminds me to put myself on the Don't Call list. I get far too many telemarketers trying to sell me a student credit card at 9am on Sunday morning.

Please! You're trying to sell a credit card to a college student at 9am Sunday?

They need a "do not mail" list, I keep getting bogus 30% APR credit card offers - and that's all I get in the mail.